By David Joel Miller
Life principles you need to accept.
Do you spend a lot of your time and energy worrying about what others will think of you? Low self-esteem? Do you beat yourself up because you made mistakes and think everyone knows about it? Here are some huge life principles you may need to consider when evaluating your life.
A Hundred years from now no one will remember this.
It is easy to think that “Everyone” knows what you have done and not done. Find yourself thinking badly about yourself? Consider that in a hundred years from now no one will know about your mistakes. There is, in fact, a low probability that anyone will know you ever lived.
Truth is that people two blocks from your house right now may not know anything about you. Very few of us are just that important. Stop worrying about what others think about you and focus on doing the things you think you should be doing.
None of this really matters.
Most of what we do is forgotten by the end of the day. Look in your history books. Those wars and conflicts – the people who fought in these wars are mostly forgotten. People died in labor strikes. A few of us remember, but once you are gone can you really convince yourself that what you bought and what you own will make any difference.
Enjoy it while you can, but as far as I can tell, you can’t take it with you and even the presidents get forgotten. Be the kind of person you would like to be eventually. Quick can you tell me what President Tyler stood for?
No one gets out of here alive.
Eventually we all die. The most you get is a line on the tombstone and maybe an obituary in a paper. A hundred years later even your descendants won’t know all that much about you. Live the best you can and let it go.
Things look different depending on where you are standing.
Most of what we know or think we know is the result of where we were born and grew up. If you had lived somewhere else your life would have been different. Stop being so sure that things are the way you see them and accept that others are standing in another spot.
What if there was something going on behind that tree that you can’t see?
Most of what we take for truth and surety is only our point of view.
It is always today.
You can’t change what you did yesterday and you can’t do anything tomorrow. It is always the same day – today. Live in today and stop looking over your shoulder. Do not leave things you should do for tomorrow. Do these things today.
Average gets lost in the crowd.
What to stand out? Want people to think highly of you? Want more self-esteem? Do more stuff. Take chances. Those who are afraid to be noticed do not get noticed.
Want to be exceptional? Do something others do not do every day.
You can’t please everyone.
No one can please everyone. Please one group or faction and you anger the others. Do what you feel you should be doing. Please yourself and stop being concerned about what others are thinking about you.
The higher you are the more people throw things at you.
Know who the president is? Do they say bad things about him? Did they do that to the president before him and the one before that? If you do something you will get criticized. The more you do the more you get criticized. Are you trying to tell me that people should not criticize you? What – you think you are more important than the president?
If it isn’t scary it isn’t special.
New things, especially the creative inventive things, always come with a large dose of risk. Want to be special, do special things.
You can’t win if you don’t play.
Sitting out the game does not make you a winner. You have to get in there run, pass, catch, and then you have a shot at it. Playing it safe is another name for planning to lose. Life has no safe spots. Stop telling yourself to be careful and start telling yourself that you need to take more risks. Intelligent, thoughtful risks are fine, but everything, even the expected things, have risks.
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For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse and Co-occurring disorders see the about the author page. For information about my other writing work beyond this blog check out my Google+ page or the Facebook author’s page, up under David Joel Miller. Posts to the “books, trainings and classes” category will tell you about those activities. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books
How many of these unpleasant life truths have you faced?