Why your life’s going nowhere.


By David Joel Miller.

You can’t get very far with a flat tire.

Life out of balance

You can’t get very far with a flat tire.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

The circle is a very ancient symbol of a balanced life.  To keep your life in balance, you need to keep all the different parts of your life in their proper size.  It’s easy to focus on one part of your life and neglect the others.  It helps to think of a well-functioning life as a wheel with many spokes. Look at each of these life segments and see if there are areas of your life that need improvement.

Instead of starting this new year off with a lot of resolutions that are likely to be quickly discarded, try making some small improvements in each of the major areas of your life. Take small steps repeatedly, and you will go a long way.

Physical health affects your life.

Your body and your mind are not two separate things.  They are interconnected.  When people are in the problem, mental illness, substance abuse or any other issue, they tend to neglect their physical health.  Attend your physical health is an important part of recovery.  Working on your physical health may include going to a doctor, improving your diet, drinking more water and getting more sleep.

Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you can’t be happy because you have health challenges. Make every effort to do what you can to take good care of your physical body.

Emotional and mental health are important.

Problems in your emotional life will interfere with all the other areas. If you are struggling with depression, anxiety, anger issues, or a drug and alcohol problems you need to attend to those issues. Trying to struggle through life with one of these weights on your back is not a virtue. You can only drive your car so far on a flat tire. Being willing to get help for your emotional problems is a sign of strength and a first step on the road to a happy life.

Your Financial Life shouldn’t cause you unhappiness.

When life’s not going the way, you want it to; it’s very tempting to try to make yourself feel better by treating yourself. Those little splurges add up over time. The majority of Americans, then this is true of many other developed countries, have little or no savings. In the short run, it’s hard but over the lifetime learning to earn more money, spend a little less, pay off your bills and develop a financial cushion results in a life that’s in much better balance.

Job and career activities should be more than just income.

If you don’t have a job getting one is important. Somehow everyone needs a source of income. If there’s any way, you can work you will feel better about yourself earning your income. If you have a disability that prevents that working look for a volunteer opportunity or some other way to be productive. Going each day to do something you enjoy filter life with happiness. Once past that initial job, it’s important to look at your career. Where will this job take you in 10, 20 or 40 years?

Family and friends can support your success or your failure.

Humans need positive, supportive relationships. Try to resolve differences with those that are close to you. Work at creating friendships that support you and in which you’re able to support your friends. If you have family members who have their own emotional problems, you may need to limit your time and exposure to them. Invest some time in creating new friendships. Time spent in enjoyable activities with friends is not wasted time. It is time invested in having a quality life.

Your spiritual or religious life is important.

Having a spiritual or religious belief can be a source of strength and support in the difficult times. If you have a faith or tradition that enriches your life, invest time in your practices. Many people find they need to re-examine their religious beliefs. If you’ve adopted a faith because it was what your family or someone else believed you need to ask yourself this is what you believe?

A spiritual or religious belief should make you a better person and a happier one. If you find that the religion you are following makes you feel bad about yourself or makes you angry and hate others, you may need to take another look at whether this is what your higher power wants for you.

Many people find that they benefit from time spent with other people who have the same faith. Just as it’s often helpful to get financial advice, see a counselor for emotional help, or get career guidance many people find that their lives are enriched by having a spiritual adviser.

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Get the latest updates on my books, due out later this year by signing up for my newsletter. Newsletter subscribers will also be notified about live training opportunities and free or discounted books. Sign up here – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse, and Co-occurring disorders see the about the author page. For information about my other writing work beyond this blog check out my Google+ page or the Facebook author’s page, up under David Joel Miller. Posts to the “books, trainings, and classes” category will tell you about those activities. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books

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