About David Joel Miller

David Miller is a California Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Clinical Counselor, faculty member at a local college, certified trainer and writer.

Caring

Caring
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Caring

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot,

Nothing is going to get better. It’s not.”

― Dr. Seuss, The Lorax

“Some people care too much. I think it’s called love.”

― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

“I finally understood what true love meant…love meant that you care for another person’s happiness more than your own, no matter how painful the choices you face might be.”

― Nicholas Sparks, Dear John

“When it comes down to it, I let them think what they want. If they care enough to bother with what I do, then I’m already better than them.”

― Marilyn Monroe

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. I’ve also included some words related to strengths and values since the line between what we think and what we feel may vary from person to person. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings, strengths, and values.

Emotions and Feelings.

Inspiration

Every day is April Fools’ Day when you are fooling yourself

By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

Fool.

Fool.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Do you know what is real and what is a hoax?

Today is April First. In many places, people will be celebrating April Fools’ Day. This day is dedicated to a whole lot of fun practical jokes and good times. Not everyone should be laughing.

The challenge in life is to tell the difference between the truth and things that are not true, regardless of the label we choose to put on those less-than-true thoughts and comments. Today you may be able to get away with some untruths if you can tell the difference, but not every day.

The falsehoods told today in the course of the April Fools’ Day festivities are in the medieval tradition when Fools were jokesters, comedians and the like. When we know things are exaggerated and overblown they can be laughable and a bit of silly fun. Not all untruths are innocent.

The most dangerous types of lies are the kind we tell ourselves. People in recovery, from whatever they chose to call their problem, may find that they have been telling lies, giving people stories, so much they have begun to believe their own dishonesty. Substance abusers, required to be dishonest to continue their addiction are at special risk to have stopped seeing the distinction between the true and the false in their own minds.

If you have been telling yourself things that are not true and have started to believe those stories they can be a huge obstacle to overcome on your road to recovery.

People in recovery need to stop worrying about who they told what and begin to get honest with themselves. The most important person to tell the truth to is you.

Some recovering people have been told a lot of things that were not true. Those lies create a lot of pain and sometimes separating the true from the false can be a chore. When the addict starts to get honest the others around them are at risk to become confused about what is true and what is false.

Some people have families who have kept deep dark secrets. Those families can’t stand, to tell the truth. They pressure the other family members to deny things happened and to continue to rely on the make-believe family tale

Lie, falsehoods and the like are not the only untrue information that takes up residence in our heads. False memories and beliefs, delusions and hallucinations are also traps for the unwary.

There are technical distinctions between hallucinations and things that are really there. There is a realm of in-between things that the profession has to call in or out. Did you really see that or were you hallucinating? There are reports of things that look like a hallucination but are not.

People with addiction and mental illness may have seen and experienced things that other people tell you never happened.

Sometimes we see something and we decide what that means. If we are correct in our apprised that is all well and good. But what if you are mistaken in what you think this means or what has happened? We might call these false beliefs or even delusions.

It is likely that we can tell when someone else around us is delusional but can you tell when you are delusional? Are there things that kind of look like delusions but are not?

So while walking the road to recovery we need to take a look at hallucinations, false memories, and delusions and try to find ways to understand why our own mind may trick us into believing things that just are not so.

This whole area of what is true what is false and what you think you know is a lot confusing. In some posts over this month I want to explore delusions, hallucinations both true and pseudo and some other aspects of getting honest with ourselves. Since psychologists and therapists call some of these phenomena by different names and understand it differently I want to start by looking at how these two professions get such different answers and then proceed to some thoughts about why your brain and our survival may have benefited at times from believing things that turn out to not be true.

Stay tuned for more on the subject of the real and the false, truth and lies over the coming month. These posts will be interspersed with some other topics as they come up so as not to put all the readers to sleep at the same time.

Have a great day fooling around and we will return to the search for reality and recovery tomorrow.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Embracing Life Changes and Thriving

Embracing Life Changes and Thriving

Image via Pexels

Embracing Life Changes and Thriving

Change can be tough. It often leaves us feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or uncertain about the future. But it doesn’t have to be this way! With a few simple steps, you can embrace major life changes and thrive. Let’s take a look at how you can make the most of your new situation, shared below by counselorssoapbox.

Accept Change as It Comes Along

The first step in embracing major life changes is to accept that they are part of life. Change is inevitable, so it’s important to accept it without resistance. Try to keep an open mind and focus on the possibilities that come with change instead of becoming overwhelmed by the unknown. Don’t let yourself become stuck in a cycle of negative thought patterns; instead, try to focus on the potential that comes with change.

Practice Self-Care

It’s important to practice self-care when facing big life changes. Take time for yourself each day and do something calming like yoga or meditation. Make sure you get plenty of rest and stay hydrated throughout the day. Eating healthy meals and exercising regularly will also help you stay strong during times of upheaval. These small acts of self-care can make all the difference in helping you stay positive throughout your transition period.

Embrace the Challenge of Upheaval

One great way to embrace major life changes is to use them as an opportunity for growth and development — both personally and professionally. Look at this upheaval as a chance to challenge yourself in new ways, which could ultimately lead to success down the line! Consider taking online courses or attending workshops related to your field or area of interest so that you can learn new skills while honing existing ones at the same time. This will not only boost your resume but also give you valuable experience that could open up more career opportunities later on down the road.

Your coursework may have many documents that it distributes, be they notes or readings. Keeping track of all those PDFs can be tricky, however you can try this tool to combine PDFs as needed. By having all your notes in one file, you can quickly reference material without having to jump between windows.

Changing The Career Trajectory

In this ever-evolving world, it has become increasingly important to be able to adapt to life changes and get creative when thinking about career trajectories. Embracing this mindset of change is key to growth and progression. It can be a challenge, but with the right attitude, it can also be a catalyst for success. Utilizing this period as an opportunity to reevaluate and reimagine your career trajectory can open up all sorts of exciting possibilities and paths you may never have considered before. After all, innovation starts with having the courage to step outside of your comfort zone.

Build a Portfolio and Design a Top-Notch Resume

Now is also a great time to build up your portfolio or design a top-notch resume if you don’t already have one prepared. A portfolio will showcase your skillset, while an impressive resume can help attract potential employers or clients who may be interested in what you have to offer them professionally—and could even lead to some extra income! You never know where these investments now might take you later on down the line—so why not give it a shot?

Consider Starting a Business

Finally, consider starting a business as an LLC if possible—and if it fits with your unique goals and ambitions. Starting a business can be a great way to take charge and take action on your vision in life. Before signing up, make sure you do your research and read any available LLC reviews. This way you’ll know exactly what benefits and downsides come with a business before committing. Weighing all of the pros and cons will leave you feeling confident knowing that the decision to start an LLC was made consciously and thoughtfully. Embrace this new opportunity today – there’s never been a better time to get innovative.

By accepting change as it comes along, practicing self-care, embracing challenges head-on, building up portfolios/resumes, and considering starting a business (if feasible), anyone can make major life changes work for them—and even thrive along the way. So take heart knowing that with these tips by your side—you too can turn any upheaval into success stories full of possibility.

This post was contributed by Jennifer Scott

Attractive

Attractive
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Attractive

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.”

― Albert Einstein

“The more you feed your mind with positive thoughts, the more you can attract great things into your life.”

― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

“People are rarely as attractive in reality as they are in the eyes of the people who are in love with them. Which is, I suppose, as it should be.”

― David Levithan, Every Day

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. I’ve also included some words related to strengths and values since the line between what we think and what we feel may vary from person to person. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings, strengths, and values.

Emotions and Feelings.

Inspiration

Jealous.

Jealous.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Jealous.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“You can only be jealous of someone who has something you think you ought to have yourself.”

― Margaret Atwood, The Handmaid’s Tale

“Just for the record, the weather today is bitter with occasional fits of jealous rage.”

― Chuck Palahniuk, Diary

“Insecure people only eclipse your sun because they’re jealous of your daylight and tired of their dark, starless nights.”

― Shannon L. Alder

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings.

Emotions and Feelings.

Inspiration

Attached

Attached
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Attached

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“When one tugs at a single thing in nature, he finds it attached to the rest of the world.”

― John Muir

“To conceal anything from those to whom I am attached, is not in my nature. I can never close my lips where I have opened my heart.”

― Charles Dickens

“It’s not much of a tail, but I’m sort of attached to it.”

― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. I’ve also included some words related to strengths and values since the line between what we think and what we feel may vary from person to person. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings, strengths, and values.

Emotions and Feelings.

Inspiration

Gentleness.

Gentleness.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Gentleness.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“Close friends are truly life’s treasures. Sometimes they know us better than we know ourselves. With gentle honesty, they are there to guide and support us, to share our laughter and our tears. Their presence reminds us that we are never really alone.”

― Vincent van Gogh

“A friend is one to whom one may pour out the contents of one’s heart, chaff and grain together, knowing that gentle hands will take and sift it, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness, blow the rest away.”

― Dinah Maria Craik

“I have three precious things which I hold fast and prize. The first is gentleness; the second is frugality; the third is humility, which keeps me from putting myself before others. Be gentle and you can be bold; be frugal and you can be liberal; avoid putting yourself before others and you can become a leader among men.”

― Lao Tzu

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings.

Emotions and Feelings.

Inspiration

Have you seen the unseen other?

Ghost

Unseen other.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Have you seen the unseen other?

By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Counselor.

Have you ever felt the presence of someone you couldn’t see?

I’ve recently came across an interesting podcast from the British psychological society about just this topic. Dr. Jon Sutton, editor of The Psychologist magazine, talks to Dr. Ben Alderson-Day, an Associate Professor at Durham University who has written a book about this kind of experience.

Experiencing the feeling that there was someone close by that you could not see is a relatively common phenomenon. This kind of experience has been described a lot by people who are in conditions of sensory deprivation. Skiing through a blinding snowstorm requires using senses other than vision to navigate. People who dive in darkened caves may experience things beyond the range of human sight.

We’re pretty confident that just because I don’t see a person hiding in the darkness in the alley doesn’t mean they’re not there. But how do we explain the times when I sense someone there who later jumps out at me?

Lack of perception doesn’t equal lack of existence.

When the idea of germs was first presented, people laughed at the possibility of tiny creatures we couldn’t see. Now that we have microscopes, a whole new universe of possibilities is visible. We also know that X-rays can pass through the body totally unnoticed. Just because I can’t see them doesn’t mean X-rays don’t exist.

In the early days of psychology and psychological research, a lot of attention was paid to the boundary between what we can perceive via the senses and what we might experience in the subconscious or unconscious realm.

Not everyone who looks at a painting or landscape sees the same details. Perceiving something others don’t experience doesn’t necessarily mean you have a mental disorder. Is it possible that some people perceive phenomena not readily available to our senses?

Altered perception, including hallucinations, doesn’t equal psychosis.

In the early part of my career, I worked in a locked psychiatric facility. In learning to diagnose, we had to pay a lot of attention to the differences between relatively normal perception and something that might indicate psychosis. Not everyone who sees something hears something, smell something, and so on has a diagnosable mental illness.

For most of these iffy experiences, we can come up with plausible explanations.

It’s common for people to believe that they hear someone calling their name, but when they look, no one is there. We dismissed this with the explanation that when the brain hears sounds, it can’t identify it makes them into a familiar word, and nothing is more familiar than your own name.

Should all religious experiences be dismissed as examples of psychosis?

There’s an exception in the diagnostic manual for hearing and seeing things in the context of a religious experience that we generally ignore. If you’re a Catholic and believe you have seen the Virgin Mary or some other Saint, That shouldn’t count towards a diagnosis of psychosis. But if Mary tells you to go to Walmart, fill up your shopping cart, and it’s all free, we believe that is moved from a religious experience into a delusion.

Should you ever trust your gut?

There’s a lot of good evidence that you should trust your gut. When you meet a new person, if you get an uneasy feeling, you probably should walk away. Plenty of advice tells you that you should trust your “felt sense” or intuition. There’s a lot of literature devoted to the idea that you can develop your intuition. Highly creative people, both in the arts and the sciences, often credit their advances to intuition. Since we can’t readily see intuition, it’s easy to be skeptical. But if you’ve ever had an experience where you’ve trusted your intuition, and you turned out to be right, you have to wonder if that was more than just a chance coincidence.

It’s important to get to know yourself, and one model of personality that’s often used is the Myers-Briggs personality inventory. Intuition is one of the personality characteristics that’s been widely studied. I don’t think anybody would believe that people who are high in intuition are inherently mentally ill.

Is there a difference between intuition and psychic abilities?

As much as modern psychology has endorsed the idea of intuition, its role in creating personality, and its value in making decisions, it’s equally likely that modern science will laugh at the existence of psychic abilities. Of course, not everybody defines intuition or psychic abilities in the same way. People who were high in intuition as very young children and have gone on to develop that as a part of their personality are very likely to think of themselves as having some sort of psychic abilities.

Why my sudden interest in intuition and psychic abilities?

Currently, I’m working on writing a series of books featuring Nancy Nusbaum, a character from one of my published novels. Nancy majored in journalism in college, but the only field placement she could find was writing articles for the Paranormal News. As part of her job, Nancy must investigate unusual, potentially paranormal events. Her series of adventures, vaguely reminiscent of the X-Files, will allow me to explore this area of what is normal, what is paranormal, and the distinction between intuition and psychic abilities.

Stay tuned for some blog posts about personality factors and getting to know yourself. If you’d like to read more about my fiction writing career and hear about the release of Nancy Nusbaum novels, check out my writing blog davidjoelmillerwriter.com

Does David Joel Miller see clients for counseling and coaching?

Yes, I do. I can see private pay clients if they live in California, where I am licensed. If you’re interested in information about that, please email me or use the contact me form.

Staying in touch with David Joel Miller.

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For more information about my writing journey, my books, and other creative activities, please subscribe to my blog at davidjoelmillerwriter.com

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available on Amazon now! And more are on the way.

For more about my books, please visit my Amazon Author Page – David Joel Miller

For information about my work in mental health, substance abuse, and having a happy life, please check out counselorssoapbox.com

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Assertive

Assertive
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Assertive

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge: it is those who know little, not those who know much, who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science.”

― Charles Darwin, The Descent of Man

“I have noticed that even those who assert that everything is predestined and that we can change nothing about it still look both ways before they cross the street.”

― Stephen Hawking, Black Holes and Baby Universes and Other Essays

“What can be asserted without evidence can also be dismissed without evidence.”

― Christopher Hitchens, God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. I’ve also included some words related to strengths and values since the line between what we think and what we feel may vary from person to person. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings, strengths, and values.

Emotions and Feelings.

Inspiration

Acting Presidential – Presidents’ Day Inspiration.

Acting Presidential.

Post by David Joel Miller.

Abraham Lincoln

Abraham Lincoln.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

“We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory will swell when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature.”

― Abraham Lincoln, Great Speeches / Abraham Lincoln: with Historical Notes by John Grafton

“Tolerance implies no lack of commitment to one’s own beliefs. Rather

it condemns the oppression or persecution of others.”

― John F. Kennedy, John F. Kennedy 1917-63: Chronology-documents-bibliographical aids

“America, this is our moment. This is our time. Our time to turn the page on the policies of the past. Our time to bring new energy and new ideas to the challenges we face. Our time to offer a new direction for the country we love.”

― Barack Obama

“I don’t want some mom, whose son may have recently died, to see the commander in chief playing golf.”

― George W. Bush

“the government both in the executive and the legislative branches must carry out in good faith the platforms upon which the party was entrusted with power. But the government is that of the whole people; the party is the instrument through which policies are determined and men chosen to bring them into being. The animosities of elections should have no place in our Government, for government must concern itself alone with the common weal.”

― George Washington, The Complete Book of Presidential Inaugural Speeches: from George Washington to Barack Obama

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.