Stressed Out.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
What happens when you get stressed out?
By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist, Counselor, and Certified Life Coach.
Experiencing stress is universal.
It’s not just humans that experience stress. The experience of stress seems to affect all animals, and in highly similar ways. How you handle those feelings of stress and the long-term results can vary from individual to individual. Life transitions can be especially stressful.
In populations of animals that are under stress, illness, and mortality rates go up. The same thing happens to humans. What varies from person to person can be which of the common reactions to stress are most prominent, and what are the subsequent results. Let’s begin with a list of the common reactions and see how many of these might be familiar to you.
The difference between stress and anxiety.
Stress is that automatic response to danger. Anxiety is the fear we get that something bad is about to happen. Stress can produce anxiety, and anxiety could be stressful, but the ways in which you manage these two emotions are different. In later sections, I’ll talk about ways of coping with both stress and anxiety and how to differentiate the two.
The 4F’s of stress response.
Common immediate physiological responses to stress are sometimes described as the 4F’s. We seem to share these immediate responses with all other vertebrates. Even little lizards will respond in these ways when frightened or stressed.
Robert Sapolsky, in his book Why Zebras Don’t Get Ulcers, describes the response of a zebra to suddenly seeing a lion coming their way. I’ll borrow a little of that description here just to give you an idea.
Do you freeze up when under stress?
Anything that startles you or stresses you may cause you to freeze up. It’s an immediate and initial response. Police officers must be overtrained so that when they pull their gun, they can make an instant decision. Freezing up in those kinds of crisis situations could result in an officer’s death.
When you’re stressed out, do you end up speechless? Is your first response confusion? Don’t think you’re alone. Stress is like an automatic circuit breaker, temporarily shutting down your nervous system, giving you time to think about the situation and decide what you want to do.
What would the zebra do? They would freeze up, hoping that the lion would think they were a rock and walk on by. But that freeze only lasts for a few seconds, and then, without even thinking, the second of the 4F’s kicks in.
Does stress make you flee?
The nervous system of our poor zebra, now under stress, begins to secrete large amounts of stress hormones. The blood flow to the zebra’s brain is now redirected to the four legs. Zebra is ready to run away at top speed.
Additionally, the hormones cause the zebra’s bowel and bladder to open up, dropping all that undigested grass and urine on the ground and lightening the load.
Under stress, do you become confused or have difficulty thinking? Do you sometimes feel you have an upset stomach and need to go to the bathroom? You’re feeling the same symptoms of stress that the zebra would feel, and so do all other vertebrae.
Under stress, do you fight?
Now our zebra is up against the rocks, and the lion is still coming. The zebra’s instinctive response is to kick as hard as possible at the lion’s head. That zebra might well be thinking, “lion, if you’re going to try to eat me, I’m going to hurt you really bad.” The zebra now kicks at the lion’s head, and if he is lucky enough to hit the lion in the eye, the lion may run away in pain.
We humans, when under stress, often feel an overwhelming urge to strike back at the person or thing that is stressing us. Sometimes we do that physically, and other times we may do it symbolically by saying nasty things or acting out in other ways.
Do you look for friends or romantic partners when under stress?
The last of the 4F’s has been described by several authors and goes by several names. It is sometimes described as flirt, friend, or fornicate. Under stress, most vertebrae will seek out others of their own kind either for sexual activity, to pass on their genes before they die, or for friendship and affiliation to comfort themselves.
Learning to recognize the symptoms of stress can help you cope.
Becoming aware that you are under stress and recognizing some of the common responses to stress can help reduce the impact on your body and your mind. Over the long term, continuing stress can be damaging both to your body and to your mental health.
Think about the ways in which you can learn to better cope with chronic stress and the things you might be able to do to change the situation.
Recommended Mental Health Books
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Does David Joel Miller see clients for counseling and coaching?
Yes, I do. I can see private pay clients if they live in California, where I am licensed. If you’re interested in information about that, please email me or use the contact me form.
Recently, I began working with a telehealth company called Grow Therapy. If you’d like to make an appointment to work with me, contact them, and they can do the required paperwork and show you my available appointments. The link for making an appointment to talk with me is: David Joel Miller, LMFT, LPCC
Life coaching clients must be working toward a specific problem-solving goal. Coaching is not appropriate if you have a diagnosable mental health problem. Also, life coaching is not covered by insurance. If you think life coaching for creativity or other life goals might be right for you, contact me directly.
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