Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.

I have returned from my long absence.

By David Joe.l Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

So much to do and so little time.

A lot of things have taken place over the summer, which has cut into my time for creative pursuits. Despite my best efforts, I found it difficult to keep up on everything over the summer. Initially, I thought that with the pandemic working from home would result in an increase in productivity, and while it did, sort of, increase my productivity in some areas, some of the things have had to go on to back burners. So, here’s a little bit about what I’ve been up to and what I hope to get to as we move into the fall and winter months.

I’ve completed my online teacher certification classes.

When the pandemic first came on the scene, no one had any idea how we would need to react to it. There’s still a lot of confusion and disagreement that we are all having to muddle through.

One result was that the community college I teach at moved almost all of its classes online. Learning all the ins and outs of a new online platform, we are using Canvas, has been a challenge.

In addition to learning the platform, I had to create new material and convert the material I had been using for online use. I’ve added sound to all my PowerPoints and converted most of them to videos. I’m still working on slicing some of the longer videos up into shorter segments to make them more watchable and adding some of the material I would have talked about had you been in the class.

With more people vaccinated and more people used to the idea of taking certain risks in order to go back out into the world, more and more of the classes which were moved online will be back in the physical classroom.

Will I be returning to the classroom?

This is still up in the air. While I’ve had two vaccines and probably will get the booster as soon as it is available, I do know that vaccinated or not, the older you get, the more the risks if you do catch Covid. Well into my seventies, I’m aware that my risks of dying should I catch Covid are a lot higher than a faculty member who is in their thirties or forties. Having spent five days in the Covid ICU last November, the realities of the risks are very much on my mind. Fortunately, last November, I did not have Covid, and I recovered relatively quickly. I’m fully aware; however, that should I catch Covid, I probably would not be so fortunate next time.

Will I continue to teach online?

I certainly would like to. I’m hopeful that the classes I taught in the classroom in the past will be approved as online classes in the future. Additionally, exploring the possibility of teaching online courses either in substance use disorders, mental health, or simply having a happy life for another college or university.

I’m exploring the possibility of creating some online classes.

A lot of exciting new things are happening in the online education field. Not every class necessarily needs to come with units leading towards a degree. This is an exciting time in which to live. I have been investigating several platforms for creating online classes and considering what topic I might want to teach. I know there’s going to be some time needed to create that class, especially to make it interesting and engaging. As I progress with my plans for online courses, I’ll keep you informed.

If you have any ideas for a class you would like to see me teach, please leave a comment or use the contact me form. As my ideas get firmed up, I intend to conduct a survey and get all my readers’ input on the ideas I’ve come up with. Hey, if I’m going to teach a class, it ought to be one that my current readers would like to take.

Whatever happened to my YouTube channel?

Ever since Covid, all my efforts on YouTube have been directed towards short videos on substance use disorders. I stayed with a simple format and produced videos that were primarily for my students in the substance abuse counseling classes. Surprisingly to me, anyway, the number of viewers I’ve had on YouTube has continued to increase, and many of those new subscribers were not students in the classes I taught. That tells me that some of you would like to see videos on mental health topics rather than read long blog posts. Any ideas for a video you’d like to see?

Some of you have asked what happened to my writing?

My writing time has been extremely limited over the last year. I did manage to turn out a few blog posts. But my nonfiction and my novels have been on hold. Typically I write a first draft of a novel every year during the NaNoWriMo writing contest. I hope to start another novel this year, though, with less than a week to go till November. My ideas still aren’t fully developed. Maybe this year will be my year to write a half-baked novel.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now! And more are on the way.

For these and my upcoming books, please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Autonomy

Autonomy. Photo courtesy of Pixabay.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“To overcome the anxieties and depressions of contemporary life, individuals must become independent of the social environment to the degree that they no longer respond exclusively in terms of its rewards and punishments. To achieve such autonomy, a person has to learn to provide rewards to herself. She has to develop the ability to find enjoyment and purpose regardless of external circumstances.”

― Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience

“Control leads to compliance; autonomy leads to engagement.”

― Daniel H. Pink

“Love rests on two pillars: surrender and autonomy. Our need for togetherness exists alongside our need for separateness.”

― Esther Perel, Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings.

Emotions and Feelings.                      Inspiration

Staying in touch with David Joel Miller.

For more information about my writing journey, my books, and other creative activities, please subscribe to my blog at davidjoelmillerwriter.com

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available on Amazon now! And more are on the way.

For these and my upcoming books, visit my Amazon Author Page – David Joel Miller

For information about my work in mental health, substance abuse, and having a happy life, Please check out counselorssoapbox.com

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Alive.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”

― Dr. Seuss, Happy Birthday to You!

“I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow; but through it all,

Alive.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.”

― Agatha Christie

“You’re alive only once, as far as we know, and what could be worse than getting to the end of your life and realizing you hadn’t lived it?”

― Edward Albee

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings.

Emotions and Feelings.                      Inspiration

Staying in touch with David Joel Miller.

For more information about my writing journey, my books, and other creative activities, please subscribe to my blog at davidjoelmillerwriter.com

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available on Amazon now! And more are on the way.

For these and my upcoming books, visit my Amazon Author Page – David Joel Miller

For information about my work in mental health, substance abuse, and having a happy life, Please check out counselorssoapbox.com

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Guilt.

Guilty
Guilt. Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

 “My guiding principle is this: Guilt is never to be doubted.”

― Franz Kafka

“Let the guilt teach you how to behave next time,”

― Veronica Roth, Insurgent

“To show resentment at a reproach is to acknowledge that one may have deserved it.”

― Tacitus

“Every man is guilty of all the good he did not do.”

― Voltaire

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings.

Emotions and Feelings.                      Inspiration

Staying in touch with David Joel Miller.

For more information about my writing journey, my books, and other creative activities, please subscribe to my blog at davidjoelmillerwriter.com

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available on Amazon now! And more are on the way.

For these and my upcoming books, visit my Amazon Author Page – David Joel Miller

For information about my work in mental health, substance abuse, and having a happy life, Please check out counselorssoapbox.com

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Happiness.

Happy faces
Happiness. Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Happiness.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“Hope

Smiles from the threshold of the year to come,

Whispering ‘it will be happier’…”

― Alfred Lord Tennyson

“Take responsibility of your own happiness, never put it in other people’s hands.”

― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

“Many people lose the small joys in the hope for the big happiness.”

― Pearl S. Buck

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings.

Emotions and Feelings.

Inspiration

Happiness

Positive Psychology

Stages of Change Video

Authority.

Authority. Photo courtesy of Pixabay.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“Blind belief in authority is the greatest enemy of truth.”

― Albert Einstein

“Authority without wisdom is like a heavy axe without an edge, fitter to bruise than polish.”

― Anne Bradstreet

“A writer is someone for whom writing is more difficult than it is for other people.”

― Thomas Mann, Essays of Three Decades

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings.

Emotions and Feelings.

Inspiration

The Link Between Narcissism and Financial Abuse. 

The Link Between Narcissism and Financial Abuse. 

Source: Unsplash.com | By: Mathieu Stern | Rights: Free to Use

Although it’s not always the case, there is a strong correlation between narcissism and domestic violence. When a narcissist is abusive, it is most commonly referred to as narcissistic abuse. Many people may think that narcissists just use emotional or physical means to control their victims. However, there is another method used in narcissistic abuse that can be even more damaging. Since October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, it’s important to shed light on one of the most common but unspoken forms of domestic violence, financial abuse. 

Narcissism. 

Narcissism, or narcissistic personality disorder, is a condition in which a person has an inflated sense of oneself. This is often paired with a lack of empathy and a need for an excessive amount of attention and admiration. Narcissists tend to be motivated by extrinsic factors such as money, power, and status. Because of this, narcissists struggle immensely with intimate relationships.

Narcissistic Abuse.

Often, dating a narcissistic person can be a troubling experience. Narcissists go after people that are the opposite of them because they are easier to control. Those people are usually more empathetic and value personal fulfillment, fairness, and friendships. Since narcissists demand special attention and to be treated as superior, they are more likely to use abuse as a means to get what they want. Common tactics used in narcissistic abuse include gaslighting, manipulation, and verbal attacks. But what is just as common, and not as visible, is the use of financial abuse. 

Financial Abuse. 

Financial abuse involves controlling a victim’s ability to make, access, or use any of their own money. Money is one of the most powerful ways to trap a victim. The Center for Financial Security found that 99% of domestic abuse victims experience some form of financial abuse. Narcissists use money as a way to make their partners feel dependent and inferior. By restricting their partner’s access to money, the victim is forced to become reliant on their abuser, since they have no resources to leave. Financial abuse is also the most common reason people return to their abuser, yet, many don’t notice financial abuse in their lives. 

Money as a Weapon. 

Many narcissists associate money and status with power. Because of this, money is often used as a weapon to gain control over the relationship. Some common ways narcissistic abusers control their victims are by withholding their finances, stealing their money, sabotaging their credit, or preventing them from getting a job. Doing this causes the victim to be reliant on their abuser and prevents them from obtaining any financial or personal freedom. 

What to Do if You Suspect Financial Abuse.

Some narcissistic abusers don’t make financial abuse obvious. Many narcissists will even lie about their financial situation or take control over your money without you knowing. One way to check if you are being financially abused is by looking at a credit score report or bank statement. 

Unfortunately, credit scores play a huge factor in financial freedom. Purchases that allow you to be safe and independent, such as buying a home, require specific credit score ranges. Abusers know this and will try to damage your score by opening lines of credit with your name and creating massive debt on your account. You can get a free credit report to see if there are any discrepancies in your credit. Likewise, if you notice big withdrawals from your bank account or purchases made without your consent, it could be a good indicator that you are being financially abused. 

Leaving Abuse. 

Narcissistic financial abuse is a serious matter. It can cause many to go into severe poverty and prevent victims from escaping their situations. Your safety is more important than anything. If you are a victim of financial abuse, do not call out your abuser, as this can make it even more dangerous for you. Instead, talk with a trusted friend, family member, or the Domestic Violence Support Hotline about your situation to help plan your escape. No matter how bad the financial damage is, recovery is possible. There are many resources available to help guide you through this process and get you back on your feet. 

Final Thoughts. 

Many people still don’t know about narcissistic financial abuse and the long-term effects it has. Knowledge is power. To help prevent others from falling victim to financial abuse, we must first talk about it. That is why it is important, especially this coming month, that we spread awareness around this topic to help put an end to financial abuse. 

Recommended Mental Health Books

David Miller at counselorssoapbox.com is an Amazon Affiliate and may receive a small Commission if you purchase a book or product using the link on this page. Using the link will not increase the cost to you.

Ashamed

Ashamed. Photo courtesy of Pixabay.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

“We need never be ashamed of our tears.”

― Charles Dickens, Great Expectations

“I think everybody’s weird. We should all celebrate our individuality and not be embarrassed or ashamed of it.”

― Johnny Depp

“Love is too precious to be ashamed of.”

― Laurell K. Hamilton, A Stroke of Midnight

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. There are an estimated 100,000 words in the English language that are feelings related. Some emotions are pleasant, and some are unpleasant, but all feelings can provide useful information. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Look at these related posts for more on this topic and other feelings.

Emotions and Feelings.

Inspiration