Family.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

Family.

Your family

Family.

“I have learned that to be with those I like is enough”

― Walt Whitman

“That’s what people do who love you. They put their arms around you and love you when you’re not so lovable.”
― Deb Caletti

“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.”
― George Burns

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Why you should talk to yourself.

By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

Talking to yourself, especially out loud has some benefits.

Girl talking out loud.

Girl Talking.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

People who talk to themselves out loud can make people around them very nervous.  When we think about somebody who is talking out loud many people are likely to think of the psychotic person who was speaking to the voices or the disturbed person who is rambling on and on for no particular reason.  There can be some very definite positive benefits to talking to yourself.

Children are particularly likely to be talking to themselves out loud.  They have not yet developed the skills to self-monitoring and only speaking out loud when they are alone.  If you find that you are still talking out loud to yourself, this does not necessarily mean that are losing your mind.  But it may mean is that you have something very important on your mind and are forgetting to self-monitoring for other people around.  Below are some reasons that speaking to yourself out loud may be helpful.

You become a better public speaker.

Many famous public speakers began by practicing their speeches out loud.  If you know that you’re going to need to make a presentation, it can really improve your performance to practice that speech out loud.

Talking to yourself out loud reinforces memories.

If you just heard something and you need to remember it, saying it over and over again to yourself can help.  Going over a chain of events A happened and then B can help you to remember those events in sequence.

Talking allows you to practice what you are going to say.

Sometimes we know we’re going to have to have one of those difficult talks with someone.  It’s important to get the words just right.  Practicing what you’re going to say can help you identify things that may come out other than the way you want them to.  Listening to what you have to say can help you find just the right way to convey that information.

Talking to yourself helps you learn the step of a process.

When you’re trying to learn a new procedure and there are several steps, it can help you to remember this process if you repeat each step as you do it.  In skills training, the trainer may initially repeat the steps out loud to the client.  They will then have the client do the process while repeating the steps out loud.  Finally, the client repeats the process while saying the steps silently in their head.

Talking aloud helps to clear a crowded mind.

People with very active, busy minds find that it can be helpful to clear that mind by going ahead and saying the things that are bothering them.  Sometimes this can be an automatic unconscious behavior.  While this is helpful to the person with a busy crowded mind it can be upsetting to others who might accidentally overhear.

You develop storytelling skills.

Good storytellers practice telling their stories over and over.  If you’re going to be telling that story out loud to others it’s best to practice the story out loud.  Highly creative people often tell themselves stories. Sometimes when they’re alone they tell them out loud.  As you develop your storytelling and your self-monitoring skills you are likely to learn to tell the stories with your mouth closed and the words retained in your head.

You develop a supportive relationship with yourself.

You’re going to spend a lot of time with yourself.  Work of becoming your own best friend.  One way of becoming supportive of yourself is to have those self-talks that you wish you could have with other people.  The more you practice these self-talks the better you will be able to contain them within your head instead of having them leak out and others hear them.

It helps you to focus on a task or conversation at hand.

Sometimes we repeat things out loud during a conversation with another person.  It can help to confirm that we’ve heard things accurately.  You can also use talking aloud to help you focus your attention on what is being discussed or what you need to do.

It improves self-monitoring skills.

People who are working on their self-monitoring skills may find it useful to comment on their activities as they do them.

Self-talk helps you self-soothe.

When you’re feeling upset or on edge talking to yourself can be helpful.  Remind yourself that you are safe.

You improve your creativity by exploring possibilities.

Creative people may find it useful to have these conversations out loud to explore possible conversations.

So if you or someone in your life makes a habit of talking out loud consider whether this is a helpful skill or a lack of self-monitoring.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Work.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

Work.

worker resting

Work.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

“Be steady and well-ordered in your life so that you can be fierce and original in your work.”

― Gustave Flaubert

“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.”

― Anonymous

“We often miss opportunity because it’s dressed in overalls and looks like work”

― Thomas A. Edison

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Kindness.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

Kindness.

kindness-1197351_1280 (1)

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.”

― Plato

“Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind.”

― Henry James

“Do your little bit of good where you are; it’s those little bits of good put together that overwhelm the world.”

― Desmond Tutu

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Belonging.

Sunday Inspiration.          Post by David Joel Miller.

Belonging.

Belonging

Belonging.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

“How could you ever feel comfortable if no matter where you went you felt like you belonged someplace else?”

― Mark Peter Hughes, Lemonade Mouth

“I didn’t belong as a kid, and that always bothered me. If only I’d known that one day my differentness would be an asset, then my early life would have been much easier.”

― Bette Midler

“The desire to belong is in every mind.”

― Debasish Mridha

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Serenity.

Sunday Inspiration.          Post by David Joel Miller.

Serenity.

Serenity

Serenity.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.”

― Lao Tzu

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Ways you are preventing success.

Success.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

Are you getting in your own way?

Creating the life you want takes work. Whatever your goals and those goals should reflect your values, it can be difficult getting things done. A successful life does not need to be all about money, though having the funds available will allow you to accomplish more.  With all the hard work you put in it is important to not do things that undermine your own success

Regardless of whether your life plan includes helping others, being a great artist or athlete, having good children, a financial goal, or some other accomplishment, reaching those aims takes effort.  Make sure you’re not putting roadblocks in your own success path.

With all that needs to be done to create the life you want, you do not want to be doing things that undermine your progress. Many people are unconsciously engaging in thoughts and behaviors that make reaching their desired outcomes that much harder.  Take a look at the list below and see if any of these items apply to you. How many of these goal interfering things are you doing?

Saying it can’t be done.

If you say you can’t do something, if you say it can’t be done, you have prevented that outcome from ever happening.  Positive self-talk can help motivate you to reach your goals.  Negative self-talk is your own mind getting in the way of you accomplishing things.  Make it a habit of approaching your tasks with a positive frame of mind.  Positive affirmations set you up for success.  Negative affirmations tell your mind you don’t really believe in yourself.

Waiting for the right time.

There is no right time hiding off in the future for following your dreams. Every day is today and today is the only possible time to begin to work on yourself.  Accomplishing great things requires putting in the work.  Successful people are skilled at what they do.  Developing that success requires a great deal of practice and patience.

Looking for someone to blame.

Focusing on others, what they should do and shouldn’t do, does not get you moving. You are the one who controls this instance. You may have limited choices over some things, but blaming others avoids focusing on the things you do have control over. People who fail have lots of people to blame.  People who succeeded in reaching their goals take personal responsibility for their progress.

Saying you don’t have the time.

We all have the same amount of time each week like every other inhabitant of planet earth. You get 168 hours this week. Use this time wisely because once this week is gone it will never come again. Do not put off taking the actions today that will create your tomorrows.  Every day life happens.  Don’t expect suddenly to have an open period in your life when you have nothing to do other than work on your success.

Your background is preventing you.

People from any possible background have accomplished great things. Then there are those who appear to have had all the possible advantages and still, their life went nowhere.  Other people struggle with great adversity and still reach their goals.  No matter where you started or what should have been, many things are possible.

Don’t spend your time focusing on the things that can’t be done.  Look for those things that are possible, that move you forward in a positive direction. Take the life you have had so far and use that to push you forward to create the best possible future life.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Growth.

Sunday Inspiration.          Post by David Joel Miller.

Growth.

Growth

Growth.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

“Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth.”

― John F. Kennedy

“We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations.”

― Anaïs Nin

“Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.”

― Andy Rooney

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Getting your needs met.

By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

Needs

Not getting your emotional needs met?
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

What if you haven’t been getting your needs met?

If you have been thinking that you have needs that are not being met, you need to be the one to take the steps to get those needs met. Too often people sit back waiting, expecting someone else to realize what is needed and meet those needs.

If you’re old enough to be reading this yourself, you have reached the age where you have to take responsibility for your own needs.  It would be wonderful if other people could know your needs, read your mind, and do the things you need for them to do. Unfortunately, mind reading is a skill most people do not have.

Effectively getting your needs met is a skill that you can develop.  Below are some ways that you might develop the skills to more successfully get your needs met.

Identifying the needs that you have.

One significant reason you may be unable to get your needs met is that you may be unclear about what those needs are.  Think about those things that you would like more of in your life.  Other things you may want less of in your life.  What specifically will you need in order to feel that your needs have been met?

It can help to write out these lists.  Sometimes you will have a very specific list of things you need.  You may need a ride going somewhere, you may need help with shopping, or it may be an emotional need that you want to meet.  Some needs are easier to identify than others.

On occasion, you may not be clear what your needs are.  You may simply feel uneasy, anxious, or discouraged.  Spend some time thinking about what these needs are.  It may help to discuss your unmet needs with a friend or supporter.  Be careful not to insist that this friend or supporter must be the one to meet that need.  Once you’ve identified specifically what the need is which must be met, you can move on to the next part of the process.

Can you meet this need yourself?

It’s likely that some of the needs you have, you will be able to meet yourself or you can learn to meet this need.  Work on identifying specifically how you could go about meeting your need rather than being dependent on others. You may have to develop a written plan to help you in the process of learning to meet your own needs.  Begin by identifying the things you need which you can learn to do yourself.  But what if you can’t meet this need yourself?

Who should you ask to get these needs met?

The next step in the process of learning to get needs met involves identifying who might be able to do that for you.  Maybe your need involves a problem with a business or government agency that you are dealing with.  You may need to talk to a specific person in order to get that problem solved.  Be sure that you are talking to the person who might be able to help you with this issue.

Sometimes a crisis crops up.  Say your car isn’t working and you need to get work.  Who could help you with this?  You may need to call some friends who have cars and might be able to give you a ride.  Other times you might need to find the bus schedule and how much time it would take to get there on the bus.  In some situations, the person who could meet this need may be a taxi or other paid ride service.

Persistence pays off, keep asking.

Some of the people who you will need help from in order to meet these needs may have many other things to do.  You may need to ask for what you want more than once.  Sometimes you have to remind people.  Other times you may need to be persistent enough that you become a priority in their daily schedule.

Think about using this process to do a better job of meeting your life needs.  First, get clear on what you need.  Secondly, decide whether this is something you can do yourself.  Then if this requires someone else to help you meet that need, identify who that person might be.  Lastly, be persistent, keep asking in a polite way.

Try using this process and see if you are not able to improve the number of your needs that are getting met.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Excitement.

Sunday Inspiration.          Post by David Joel Miller.

Excitement.

The excitement of life.

Excitement.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

“I wanted change and excitement and to shoot off in all directions myself, like the colored arrows from a Fourth of July rocket.”

― Sylvia Plath

“Choose thoughts that give you the emotions of being alive and excited about life.”

― Bryant McGill, Simple Reminders: Inspiration for Living Your Best Life

“The excitement of dreams coming true is beyond the description of words.”

― Lailah Gifty Akita

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.