20 Reasons you’re not reaching your goals.

By David Joel Miller.

What is getting in the way of reaching your goals?

Finish line

Reaching Goals.

You started out with a lot of goals you wanted to reach, but along the way, something went wrong.

Things are not turning out the way you wanted them to and are taking longer than you expected.

Sometimes you may feel like that hamster stuck in the wheel, running harder and harder but getting nowhere.

What can you do to finally reach your goals?

Here is my top 20 list of reasons you’re not reaching your goals.

1. Chasing someone else’s goal takes you in the wrong direction.

Make sure your goal reflects your passion in life. Pursuing someone else’s dream for you results in you neglecting your own dreams. Examine the goal you are working towards, are you the one who selected this goal and will reaching it satisfy you. If you are pursuing a goal to make someone else approve of you, it’s not your goal. You won’t be able to put your all into building something that’s not meaningful to you.

2. You’re pursuing the wrong goal.

Chasing money will not get you to love or happiness. Don’t make the mistake of pursuing one goal when what you want is something else. Many people make the mistake of pursuing money thinking this will get them the love and respect of others. Everyone needs enough money to meet their basic needs, but beyond that more money will not necessarily make you happier. Don’t tell yourself your pursuit of money is for your family if it takes you farther and farther away from them.

3. Your goals are fuzzy.

Beware of nebulous goals that are hard to define. You need to write goals down and research them. If your goal is success, you need to know how that success will be measured. Do you want to have a lot of friends? Do you want to do important work? Which would more say success to you, spending years alone in a lab in finding a cure for a rare disease or spending night after night on stage with people laughing at your jokes?

4. You’re waiting for “someday.”

Make inertia work for you. A body at rest requires a lot of energy to get it moving, once you start moving it takes a lot less energy to keep the progress going. Most people, when they reached their retirement years, find that their greatest regrets are not the things they did that didn’t turn out well. The biggest regrets with the things they said they would do something but never got around to doing them.

5. You’re not clear on your priorities.

If the goal you are working towards is not your top priority, it’s likely to keep getting pushed back. What you spend your time on each day is how you spend your life. As the time passes, if you’re not working on the thing you say is your goal, you haven’t made it your top priority. If you’re too busy to act on reaching your goal, then what you have in mind is a fantasy, not a goal.

6. You’ve left out some steps.

You tell yourself your goals to become a professional, a doctor, nurse, or lawyer but you have left school. Before you can be a teacher or any other professional you first must learn. If you don’t seem to be making progress toward your goal, re-examine your plan and see if there are any steps you need to take that you’ve left out of your planning.

7. Trying to do too much.

Trying to rise to the top of a profession requires you to start at the bottom. Whatever you want to accomplish, you must put in the time practicing. Working on too many things at once dilutes your effort. Highly successful people weed out the unimportant things and focus on their top priorities.

8. Trying to reach your goals too fast.

When you look closely at overnight successes, what you often find are people who spent years learning and honing their skills. Don’t be disappointed when reaching your goals takes longer than you expected.

9. You’re using the wrong tools.

Looking for a better paying job, when you require more education or training won’t get you where you want to go. Are the skills you have the ones you need to reach your goal? The world keeps changing. If you’re not updating your skills, they are becoming obsolete.

10. Your goals are negative and punitive.

Set positive goals. The evidence doesn’t support the helpfulness of using negative self-talk or punishing yourself in reaching positive outcomes.

11. You failed to develop your team.

Everyone needs a support system. The journey to reaching goals involves many people. If you want to reach goals, look for teachers, mentors, and companions for your journey. Some things you will need to become an expert on, for other tasks you will need to learn to identify the experts who can support you in your quest.

12. The closer you get to your goal the stronger resistance becomes.

Don’t slack off when you get close to your goal. If you go to college for three years and then quit what do you have? You don’t have a degree. In my lifetime, I’ve known several people who always wanted to write a book. Some of them even had a manuscript tucked away in a drawer. What they didn’t do was write that last chapter, send that book off to the publisher, or learn the skills they would need to publish it themselves. In the early stages of your journey towards your goal you can see the progress but the closer you get to your goal, the more effort it takes to break through that resistance and reach the finish line.

13. You aim low and hit the mark.

Your goals should encourage you to stretch. Many people self-handicap. The set their goals so low that they can’t possibly fail to meet them. If you repeatedly set low goals, you are planning a life of low achievement.

14. You’re not reviewing and updating your goals.

The goals you set in middle school won’t mean much when you are middle-aged. Some of the goals no longer fit you. Reevaluate those goals. If you are no closer, revise your plan. If you met them all, you might have set your expectations too low and need to raise the bar.

15. You’re using the wrong “worry process.”

Some people try to protect themselves from failure by considering every possible thing that could go wrong. They worry endlessly that they’ll make a mistake or something bad will happen. The worry-about-everything approach leaves you paralyzed in inaction. People who reach their goals consider the big possibilities. They use a “worry-enough” process. Once they have thought it through enough, they stop worrying and take action.

16. You talk about your goals rather than working towards them.

Psychologists discovered that people who talk about their goals a great deal get their satisfaction out of discussing those goals with others. As a result, they rarely take significant action. People who reach goals discuss them with fewer others. Limit your discussion of your goals to mentors, advisers and those who can support you in the process. Don’t tell everyone, but do have a few accountability partners who will encourage you to keep working towards your goals.

17. You don’t recognize what you accomplish.

Many people who feel they’re not reaching their goals have failed to recognize all the things that they have accomplished. Your big goals need to be broken down into smaller segments, and you need to recognize each of those smaller goals as you accomplish them. You don’t get a college degree by taking all the classes at once. You take a few classes each semester, and at the end, your payoff is the degree. If you’re writing a book, you write it one chapter, maybe even one paragraph at a time. Pay attention to the things you accomplish. Don’t dismiss your achievements as unimportant. Not giving yourself credit where credit is due will leave you too discouraged to continue your journey towards even larger goals.

18. You have not learned from the mistakes of others.

Whatever goal you are pursuing, make it a practice to look at how others have tried to reach similar goals. Learn from their mistakes, so you don’t have to make them all yourself.

19. You can’t picture what reaching your goals would look like.

High performers can picture what their life will be like once they reach their goal. Olympic athletes practice imagining that perfect performance, then standing on the gold medal stand. If you don’t believe you can succeed, you sow seeds of doubt in your mind. Your mind is likely to protect you by creating that failure you imagine. Avoid fantasy images of sudden wealth and fame. Picture the very real results of long, hard, work towards your goals.

20. You haven’t become your own best friend.

If you don’t like yourself, no matter how many goals you reach, it will never be enough. Spend time getting to know who you are and work on accepting that how you are right now is adequate. Self-acceptance doesn’t lead to complacency. Negative self-thoughts become obstacles in your path to reaching your goals.

Take another look at your goals. Re-examine your plans and your attitudes. Change the things you’ve been doing that are not working and head back out there in your pursuit of the life you want to have.

You will find related posts under –

motivation 

success

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Two David Joel Miller Books are available now!

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Casino Robbery is a novel about a man with PTSD who must cope with his symptoms to solve a mystery and create a new life.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Amazon Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

Want the latest on news from recoveryland, the field of counseling, my writing projects, speaking and teaching? Please sign up for my newsletter at – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse, and Co-occurring disorders see my Facebook author’s page, davidjoelmillerwriter. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com.

Advertisements

Fear.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

Fear.

Fear.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Fear.

“Collective fear stimulates herd instinct, and tends to produce ferocity toward those who are not regarded as members of the herd.”

― Bertrand Russell, Unpopular Essays

“Do one thing every day that scares you.”

― Eleanor Roosevelt

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.”

― Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Can you spot the paranoid person?

By David Joel Miller.

Paranoia comes in many shapes and sizes.

Fearfulness

Paranoia.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

How paranoia looks depends on the group of people you’re looking at. Researchers who study paranoia believe it may have had an evolutionary advantage. Those who were too trusting did not survive. “It is important to ask why paranoia might be so common in the general population. One possible explanation is that paranoia is a trait that was selected and distributed in humans due to its adaptive value” (Ellett & Chadwick, 2003, 2007).

In many situations, it’s better to be suspicious and cautious, even if your wrong then to be trusting and end up harmed in some way. Being suspicious when in doubt kept our ancestors alive to reproduce. Trust issues seem to run on a continuum from mild suspicion to unhealthy, pathological paranoia. Recent research tells us that mild to moderate paranoia is a lot more common among nonclinical populations than has been recognized in the past. Most of these people who experience an episode of paranoia do not go on to develop a serious mental illness.

According to the Freeman brothers “paranoia is on the rise, fueled by disproportionate media coverage of the dangers we face from others; by increasing urbanization; and by a range of other social factors including fear of crime.”

Paranoia also depends on your viewpoint. If you have been the victim of violence or trusted when you shouldn’t have, you become less trusting. Groups who have historically suffered prejudice and violence, become more suspicious. Suspiciousness in women is likely to be diagnosed as anxiety. Wariness in men is more likely to suggest they will become violent and be diagnosed as some form of psychosis. Both Psychosis and Paranoia are much more likely to be diagnosed in males, particularly African-American males.

Definitions of paranoia.

Wikipedia defines paranoia as “an instinct or thought process believed to be heavily influenced by anxiety or fear, often to the point of delusion and irrationality. Paranoid thinking typically includes persecutory, or beliefs of conspiracy concerning a perceived threat towards oneself.”

Google defines paranoia as “a mental condition characterized by delusions of persecution, unwarranted jealousy, or exaggerated self-importance, typically elaborated into an organized system. It may be an aspect of chronic personality disorder, of drug abuse, or of a serious condition such as schizophrenia in which the person loses touch with reality.”

“Paranoia is defined as false beliefs that harm is occurring to oneself which is intended by a persecutor (Freeman and Garety 2000).”

The meaning of the word paranoia has changed over time. The Century Dictionary and Cyclopedia from 1890 defines paranoia as, “a chronic form of insanity developing in a neuropsychopathic constitution, presenting systematized delusions of more or less definite scope, while in other directions there may appear a fair amount of mental health. The prognosis is extremely bad.

Today in the field of psychology, paranoia is treated as a personality characteristic which can fall along a scale from extremely mild and rare to very high and constant. Ways psychologists measure paranoia are by using the Paranoia Scale (Fenigstein and Vanable 1992) or the Paranoia Suspiciousness Questionnaire (Rawlings and Freeman 1997.) When studying personality characteristics, it’s important to differentiate between traits, how paranoid a person is generally, and state paranoia, how paranoid the person may be thinking, feeling, and acting, at the moment.

In common usage, today when most people say someone is “paranoid” they are describing someone with excessive or unwarranted fears and beliefs that others dislike them, are out to get them or will betray them.

Paranoia along with excessive fear and suspiciousness are commonly associated with some of the more serious mental illness. Anyone with difficulty understanding what’s happening around them is likely to become fearful, suspicious, possibly even paranoid.

Subclinical paranoia.

Counselors see many clients with excessive, unreasonable fears. When those fears interfere with everyday functioning, they need to be treated. How much fear is warranted depends on your point of view. When someone has experienced infidelity, the belief that their partner may be cheating again may be very reasonable. If you have been the victim of violence, a heightened wariness is understandable. Life experiences, from your earliest years to the present taught you whether to be trusting or suspicious. Having been neglected or experiencing bullying increases the chances you will see the world as hostile and people as unreliable.

If, as far as you know, your partner has never cheated, but you spend hours each day checking their cell phone or social media for signs they are cheating, if you follow them or demand to know where they are every moment of the day, it’s likely your fears are about you rather than about their behavior.

According to paranoidthoughts.com, “around a third of the population regularly has suspicious or paranoid thoughts. In fact, paranoia may be almost as common as depression or anxiety.”

Subclinical levels of paranoia are associated with the anxiety disorders, depression, and with cognitive impairment. Excessive jealousy can become so severe that it needs to be treated as a “delusional disorder.”

Paranoia among people with substance use disorders.

There’s a significant presence paranoid symptoms among people with a substance use disorder. Some substances increase the level of anxiety and cause paranoia. The substance using lifestyle includes people who are untrustworthy and can result in traumatic experiences. Using illegal substances involves criminal activity. Telling whether extreme fearfulness and the beliefs that others are out to get is paranoia or reasonable is difficult when you have a substance use disorder. The belief that the police are following you and people are watching you may not be paranoia when you have a kilo of dope in the trunk of your car.

The way you think about yourself affects your risk of developing paranoia.

High self-esteem, feeling good about yourself, has been shown to reduce your risk of developing paranoia. Several other personality characteristics such as optimism and pessimism are also related. There is still the question of whether paranoia causes low self-esteem and pessimism or whether paranoia is the result of those personality characteristics.

In upcoming posts, we will talk about clinical, mental health disorders which may involve paranoia, some of the substance use disorders which involve paranoia and those subclinical problems, which lie on a continuum between trust issues, suspiciousness, and diagnosable paranoia. We should also explore some of the personality characteristics which impact your level of trust issues, suspiciousness, and paranoia.

For more on this topic see:

Trust

Paranoia

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Two David Joel Miller Books are available now!

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Casino Robbery is a novel about a man with PTSD who must cope with his symptoms to solve a mystery and create a new life.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Amazon Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

Want the latest on news from recoveryland, the field of counseling, my writing projects, speaking and teaching? Please sign up for my newsletter at – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse, and Co-occurring disorders see my Facebook author’s page, davidjoelmillerwriter. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com.

Preventing life’s regrets.

By David Joel Miller.

How can you prevent accumulating painful regrets?

Regrets.

Regret.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Are there any ways you can anticipate things you might regret and live your life in ways that would prevent having to recover from regrets?”

Here are some of the ways you can prevent a life filled with regrets and some thoughts about what to do when you discover your regrets.

Consider potential regrets before acting.

Most of the things people regret fall into one of 2 categories, things they did they wish they hadn’t and things that didn’t do they wish they had. Before taking any major action, ask yourself, will I regret this? If the answer is yes I will regret it, this course of action bears some more thought. A lot of the things people regret were those impulsive “spur of the moment” decisions. Often these are the result of jumping to conclusions or acting on impulse without considering the consequences.

Can this decision be undone?

Some decisions can easily be undone. You sign up for class and wish you hadn’t; you can drop that class if you do so quickly. Make a date with someone and get cold feet, you can cancel that date. For some things undoing that action may have a cost. But it’s often wiser to cancel that purchase and pay the fee, than to be stuck making payments on a car or house you don’t want, for years to come.

One of the major areas which can’t be undone is relationships. Once you’ve slept with someone, it is harder to break up. You can break up with a boyfriend or girlfriend, but your baby’s mother or father is forever. Once you’re married, with or without children, ending that marriage comes with both emotional and financial costs.

Delay your decision until you have more information.

Many of the decisions people regret having made were a result of not giving yourself enough time to think it over. In some places, buyers have a time period to void the sale of a major purchase. I don’t recommend you count on this. I think it’s a good idea to give buyers of expensive items time to check their purchase out and rescind the transaction is there something wrong with the item they bought. But don’t expect to return something just because you changed your mind. Once you have used something you can’t return it in the same new condition it was in when you bought it. There are lots of other actions in life, especially when it comes to relationships with other people, where you don’t have to act the moment the idea enters your head.

Think carefully about possible outcomes.

Regret often comes from the human tendency to think all your ideas are great ones when you first think them. Where possible, before you act on your inclinations, ask yourself what are the possible outcomes? Are any potential negative outcomes so severe that you’re not willing to take the chance? Regardless of how good or how exciting this possible action is if there’s a large chance it could result in a death or ruin the rest of your life you must be realistic in evaluating the risks. Be careful of the natural human fallacy to believe that you’re lucky or smart and that only the good outcomes will happen to you.

Don’t waste time on the impossible. What alternatives are available to you?

Don’t make the mistake of choosing between an action and an impossibility. Sometimes you will be forced to pick the best of 2 bad options. Sometimes you’ll hesitate because your preferred choice turns out to be an impossibility. If you are choosing between 2 very likely, very good options, use some of the other decision-making rules coming up. But, if you don’t feel comfortable with any choice, make sure you have ruled out all the impossible choices.

Consider how you feel about possible outcomes.

Many people make the mistake of trying to be totally logical and rational about the choices. Choose with your head, and you will feel the regret in your heart. While your feelings shouldn’t rule you all the time, feelings do provide valuable information. If in your heart, this doesn’t feel right, you probably should not do it.

Search for other alternatives.

Before you decide something, ask yourself are there any other possible choices? A significant source of regrets are times people chose between 2 options, say picking A instead of B, neither of which were that good a choice. Where they went wrong was failing to think about some of the other letters of the alphabet that might have been better choices.

What would a good decision maker do in this situation?

When faced with a difficult decision think about the people you know. Who that you are aware of appears to be exceptionally good at making decisions? What would that person choose?

How does this decision relate to your life goals and values?

Don’t get distracted by things the promise short-term pleasure and excitement, the next bright shiny thing. You will make better decisions when you pause to think about what are your personal values?

Once you decide against an alternative stop looking for evidence to support it.

Seems to be a part of human nature to doubt yourself. There is a problem with the way the human brain works. It’s called confirmatory bias. If we want to do something all we are likely to see re other reasons in favor of it. Unfortunately, people who decided against an alternative keep going back to that thing they decided against and looking for other reasons to go ahead and do it anyway. Once you have decided no, it is probably best to stay with that decision. On the other side of the coin if you decided to do something and suddenly get some new information that makes that decision look like one you’ll regret, don’t disregard that new information.

Use an outside expert’s advice and feedback.

Sometimes we get hung up on our own thinking. Because we think something, it must be true. When the decision has huge consequences, costs a lot of money, or might get you stuck in a situation that would be hard to get out of, it pays to seek advice from an expert. If that expert is a counselor they probably won’t, and shouldn’t, tell you what to do. What they can do is help you sort out your conflicted feelings and provide you information about what has happened to other clients faced with this decision. Sometimes it helps just to know you’re not the only one who has had trouble making this decision.

Weigh the consequences of not deciding.

If it’s a tough decision, you need to ask yourself, what will it cost me to put the decision off? Not responding to a lawsuit or a bill may make the situation worse. Just because it’s the “best price of the year” doesn’t mean you should decide to make that purchase today. It is quite possible that the difference between today’s “best price of the year” and next week’s “sale price” won’t be all that different. Don’t convince yourself that if you don’t get into a relationship with the person you’re out with now, you will never have another chance and you’ll be alone the rest of your life. If you have doubts about relationships, it may save you a lot of pain to wait until you are sure.

For many people, life’s greatest regrets are the things they wanted to do but never did. Don’t live your life putting off getting the education you want. Reach for your dreams. Try out for that acting job. Write your book. Have you let fear keep you from deciding to do things that are especially important to you?

Talk your decision through with an empathetic person.

Besides professionals, most of us have close friends and family we can talk to about the decisions we are struggling with. Ask yourself who among them are empathetic and can understand the struggle you’re going through to make this decision. It can help to talk it out with an understanding person. Pick that person carefully. You don’t need somebody telling you what to do or putting you down for what you’re thinking.

Expect to have regrets; they are an unavoidable part of life.

Nobody gets through life without having some things that they regret. Accept that you must live life and you will never have all the information before the decision that you will have afterward. Everybody must make some decisions, and they will regret some of those. Expect those crystal balls to be cloudy and hard to see into.

If you have regrets, make repair efforts a priority.

As you move through life, you will accumulate some regrets. Where possible, try to make repairs. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. If you have regrets because you have harmed others, do your best to make your amends and make things right with them.

Learn from your mistakes, improve decision-making skills.

Make conscious decisions. Consider each decision you make in life another learning opportunity. Learn from your mistakes. Watch how others around you live and learn from their mistakes. Become aware of how you make your decisions and make them consciously. Most importantly learn from those things that you regret and try to stop making the same mistakes repeatedly.

Some additional posts about regrets:

Top 6 life regrets

Will you regret doing that?

Top regrets after the breakup.

Regret. 

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Two David Joel Miller Books are available now!

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Casino Robbery is a novel about a man with PTSD who must cope with his symptoms to solve a mystery and create a new life.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Amazon Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

Want the latest on news from recoveryland, the field of counseling, my writing projects, speaking and teaching? Please sign up for my newsletter at – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse, and Co-occurring disorders see my Facebook author’s page, davidjoelmillerwriter. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com.

Shame.

Sunday Inspiration.     Post by David Joel Miller.

Shame.

Shame.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Shame.

“Shame is a soul eating emotion.”

― C.G. Jung

“To be shame-bound means that whenever you feel any feeling, need or drive, you immediately feel ashamed. The dynamic core of your human life is grounded in your feelings, needs and drives. When these are bound by shame, you are shamed to the core.”

― John Bradshaw, Healing the Shame that Binds You

“Now since shame is a mental picture of disgrace, in which we shrink from the disgrace itself and not from its consequences, and we only care what opinion is held of us because of the people who form that opinion, it follows that the people before whom we feel shame are those whose opinion of us matters to us.”

― Aristotle, The Rhetoric & The Poetics of Aristotle

Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you.  Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.

Dextromethorphan and paranoia.

By David Joel Miller.

Sometimes over-the-counter medications cause paranoia.

Fearfulness

Paranoia.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Dextromethorphan is a common antitussive (cough suppressant) medication found in over-the-counter medications. It is a common ingredient in over 140 over-the-counter medications. Unfortunately, Dextromethorphan has become an increasingly abused substance among those in the 18 to 25-year-old range. Abuse by younger teens is reported to be on the rise.

Because dextromethorphan can be purchased over-the-counter or stolen from grocery stores and pharmacies, many users have underestimated the serious, long-term effects of dextromethorphan abuse.

When taken according to directions most over-the-counter medications are relatively safe. Any medication, including over-the-counter medications, may result in side effects or allergic reactions. Abuse of Dextromethorphan can have some serious health consequences.

When Dextromethorphan is taken in larger than recommended amounts it can produce psychoactive effects. “Use in amounts exceeding those recommended, a practice which is known as “Robotripping,” may result in a toxidrome of psychomotor agitation, hallucinations and paranoia best characterized as Intoxication Delirium (Stanciu, C. et al., 2016.)

Dextromethorphan shares pharmacologic and neurobehavioral properties similar to opiates and phencyclidine (PCP.) Because of its cough suppression action is like the opiate codeine, as the dose increases it can produce dreamlike states and hallucinations somewhat like the “pipedreams” of opium smokers. As the dose increases significant unpleasant and health impairing results occur. At very high doses Delirium and misperceptions occur, resulting in paranoia and violent behavior similar to PCP intoxication.

“Intoxicated excited delirium describes the most serious and potentially deadly DXM-induced medical condition involving psychotic behavior, elevated temperature, and an extreme psychomotor agitation fight-or-flight response by the nervous system. Due to extreme violence frequently encountered such presentations, typically encountered in the emergency room setting with law enforcement involvement, have resulted in sudden death secondary to cardiac or respiratory arrest, an outcome associated with the use of physical restraints” (Stanciu, C. et al., 2016.)

One online user bulletin board, I will leave the website name out, included a number of user warnings. Users report tolerance to dextromethorphan happens rapidly, often after a single dose. Reports of paranoia were common, both paranoia caused by taking dextromethorphan and users reports of high anxiety which they called “paranoid” about the many other negative results from use.

Users have reported impaired daily functioning for as long as six years afterward.

On the way to psychosis and paranoia, users may experience a variety of alterations in perception. Commonly reported are auditory, visual, and tactile hallucinations. That may pass through a period of excitability and pressured speech which can easily be mistaken for bipolar mania. Nervousness, confusion, and disorientation can occur. A variety of physical symptoms are also likely, including tremors, slurred speech, and occasionally seizures. Some less pleasant symptoms include nausea, vomiting, respiratory depression, coma, and even death.

The particular gene responsible for metabolizing dextromethorphan is polymorphic meaning there are a number of different mutations of this gene in humans. Because of this a new user never knows just how dextromethorphan may affect them. Some people need to take a large amount to feel the effects while other people can have a serious adverse effect even at doses only a little above the label recommendations (Stanciu, C. et al., 2016.)

There are antidotal reports of serious interactions between dextromethorphan and commonly used substances such as alcohol and marijuana. In medical settings, life-threatening interactions between prescribed psychiatric medications and intentional overdoses of dextromethorphan-containing products.

Dextromethorphan is not the only drug of abuse which has been connected to an increased risk of developing paranoia. Reports of paranoia among drug users are common. Paranoia can be difficult to identify and diagnose. It is often only considered in the context of diagnosing the paranoid type Schizophrenia or Paranoid Personality Disorder. Recent studies have suggested that paranoia falls on a continuum and paranoia has rarely been studied outside the seriously mentally ill. Many things about the drug using lifestyle increase the risk of paranoia. Another reason for the shortage of information about rates of paranoia and its treatment among drug users has been the systematic exclusion of those with a substance use disorder from psychological research. Given the large overlap between those with a substance use disorder and a diagnosed mental illness, there’s a lot we haven’t learned about trust issues, suspicion, and various levels of paranoia among those with a co-occurring disorder.

I’ll continue to watch for and read research about the trust to suspicion continuum so watch for future posts on this topic.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Two David Joel Miller Books are available now!

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Casino Robbery is a novel about a man with PTSD who must cope with his symptoms to solve a mystery and create a new life.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Amazon Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

Want the latest on news from recoveryland, the field of counseling, my writing projects, speaking and teaching? Please sign up for my newsletter at – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse, and Co-occurring disorders see my Facebook author’s page, davidjoelmillerwriter. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com.

Why you should plan on being late.

By David Joel Miller.

Should you make showing up late a habit?

Time to change.

Are you on time?
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Are you tired of being on time while others are often late? Wouldn’t you just love to be the one who walks in at the last moment, makes a grand entrance, and commands everyone else’s attention? If you’re one of those people who has wasted countless hours being on time or worse yet are always arriving early, so you are not the one disrupting things by arriving late, wouldn’t you be better off developing a habit of always arriving late? Here are some simple tips to make sure you’re always the last to arrive.

Always leave later than you think you should.

Wait to start getting ready until the last-minute. Don’t include time for getting ready and travel in your plans. Leaving before the last moment is a total waste of time. Your time is absolutely more valuable than anyone else’s. If your appointment in is at three, there is clearly no point in starting to get ready before 3. Why should you have to wait if someone else is late? By always waiting to get ready until the last-minute, you can guarantee that you will not have to wait on anyone else. Your valuable time is better-spent binge-watching TV or posting on social media.

Allow less time to get there then you think it will take.

Punctual people estimate the drive will take 20 minutes, so they leave half an hour before the scheduled appointment. This process wastes valuable time you could use for your purposes. Make the most of every minute, leave 10 minutes before your meeting and drive as fast as possible to try to “make up for lost time.” Plan your schedule for ideal situations. It’s not your fault if you hit red lights or there’s traffic on the road.

Schedule more places to go each day than you can possibly reach.

If most of your appointments take an hour, schedule them 30 minutes apart. You know you can do eight things a day, so schedule 10 or 12. The places you don’t get to must not have been that important anyway. Better other people should wait for you that you should have to wait on anybody. If you don’t get to all the places you scheduled, it’s not your fault. You planned to do it, didn’t you?

Avoid creating schedules or writing anything down.

Creating schedules will just interfere with your spontaneity. Writing things down is restraining. If you make two appointments at the same time, don’t worry about it, show up to the appointment you feel like going to. Go to the other one some other time. You are important, right? As busy as you are, people will need to learn to make time for you when you get there.

Try to do everything in half the time others take.

Allow yourself half the required time for everything. Working at double or even triple speed will ensure that you have high productivity. So, what if you make a few additional mistakes? Accuracy is highly overrated. As busy and important as you are, people will simply have to accept that your way of doing things is the half-hearted fast way. People who don’t understand this need to learn to do it themselves.

Practice your excuses for being late.

Always have someone or something you can blame for your tardiness. It is not your fault. Blame whatever happens on the weather, your spouse, your kids or your dog. Complain loudly about how hard it was to find this place and how you never come to this part of town.

Do your best to make people who have been waiting on you feel sorry for you. Encourage them all to take part of the blame.

Use your late arrival to prove how important you are.

When you come in at the last minute, preferably after the event has already started, push your way past everyone to get to the front. Try to find a seat in front of others. As much as possible, complain loudly about how tough your day has been. Hold your head and moan about how unlucky you are. Use this late arrival is an opportunity to get people to feel sorry for you and to gather up the attention you deserve.

If after reading all these recommendations for planning on being late you still insist on being punctual and on time you might want to read this post on punctuality.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Two David Joel Miller Books are available now!

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Casino Robbery is a novel about a man with PTSD who must cope with his symptoms to solve a mystery and create a new life.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Amazon Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

Want the latest on news from recoveryland, the field of counseling, my writing projects, speaking and teaching? Please sign up for my newsletter at – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse, and Co-occurring disorders see my Facebook author’s page, davidjoelmillerwriter. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com.