Sunday Inspiration. Post by David Joel Miller.
Joy.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
Joy.
“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.”
― Dr. Seuss
“To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.”
― Mark Twain
“A flower blossoms for its own joy.”
― Oscar Wilde
Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.
By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.
Happiness.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
Happiness is not an accident. Being happy is not about luck. There are happy people in the humblest of situations and miserable people in mansions. Mostly this is about your attitude and developing the skills to keep your life in balance. Below is a list of happy life secrets gleaned from a variety of sources. You can have these as my gift to you. Pick through the list and see which happy life skills would benefit you and then adopt those principles today. Most of these are skills. To be effective you can’t just do it once. Being happy is something you should be practicing every day.
You can stay sad, angry, or unhappy as long as you want. Being happy is less about what you have and what happens to you, and much more about how you decide you will react to the events of life. Make a choice today that you plan to maximize your happiness. When you look down you see the dirt. When you look up you see the clouds and at night the stars.
Pain, that stuff comes and goes. Some people get way more than their share and others not so much, but the happy person learns that the pain is out of their control but the suffering is voluntary. You can make the worst of the situation or you can look for the gemstones that come mixed in the gravel of life.
An expert can see things other people miss. A finish carpenter will spot a flaw in construction as soon as they enter the room. Others will never notice that flaw. The happiness expert studies happiness, they can recognize it far off and they are practiced at scooping up and holding on to those little doses of happiness that run by each day.
Happiness is a shy creature. It is often hiding, mixed in with the activities of everyday life. Make it your task to spot those fleeting glimpses of happiness. Collect those happiness sightings the way a bird-watcher collects records of having seen a rare bird.
Some days are inherently happier than others. When there are less happy days make sure to remind yourself that there will be more happy days to come. Stay open to the possibility that tomorrow something good might happen to you.
Be careful to not get hung up on the things that you don’t have, or the things that don’t go the way you want them to. There will be times in life when things don’t go your way. You may not get to choose the events but you do get to choose the attitude you take towards them.
When you find that the things you are doing are making your life worse stop doing those things. Most of us have a hard time letting go of things that are not adding to our happiness. Bad habits, drugs, and alcohol, gambling, don’t make you happy. Don’t spend a lot of time on people who are negative and drag you down. Dispose of the things in your life that are holding you back and treasurer the things that make you happy.
Perfectionism is the enemy of happiness. Chasing being perfect is a great mirage. Trying to be perfect leaves you unsatisfied with whenever and wherever you are. Be kind and accept yourself just the way you are. A focus on your flaws robs you of the joy of the things that you do well.
Life can be stressful. Both the good things and the bad things can make you feel stressed. Learn to not stress yourself out over things. Accept what is. Resolve not to stress yourself out over things which are outside your control.
A happy life needs to stay in balance. You need time for family, for friends, for work and most importantly for you. Take care of your body, your mental health, and your relationships. You need some money for basic necessities but you also need to occasionally spend a little on yourself and your enjoyment.
To be happy you need to practice every day. Don’t take yourself so seriously. Learn to joke and have fun. Learn something new every day. Make life a great adventure, not a drudgery.
You need to take some chances, stick your neck out, and see what might happen. Sometimes to find happiness, you have to run the risk of enduring some pain. The turtle who keeps his head in the shell never gets anywhere. You will never know the things you might be great at and that might bring you great joy until you have tried them at least once.
As long as there’s something hard or unpleasant waiting for you, it’s hard to enjoy your day. Tackle that difficult project first thing the rest of the day gets easier. Start your day by dealing with something difficult or unpleasant and you will enjoy everything after.
Your negative emotions will poison you. Anger, fear, or resentments can sicken your life. Let go of all the things that you may be holding against someone else and you will lighten your load and reduce your baggage.
The more you share happiness the more there is. Smiling at others will make you feel happy. No matter how much happiness you give away you will always have some left. People who are stingy with their happiness find they run out quickly. Be careful not to equate sharing happiness was spending money or doing work for other people. You can use money, to create things which make people happy, but more money does not mean that you are able to buy more happiness.
You may be able to fool other people, but if you want to be happy stop fooling yourself. Tell yourself lies and you will be in the most unhappy relationship possible.
Doing for others can make you feel happy. Don’t cheat others out of the opportunities to feel happy by helping you. Happiness is one of those things that the more you give it away the more you have. There’s nothing wrong with allowing other people to help you. Learn to accept help graciously with a thank you.
To enlarge your happiness, develop a love of life and a joy of living.
Staying connected with David Joel Miller
Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!
My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.
Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.
Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.
As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.
Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.
Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.
Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.
Planned Accidents The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.
Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.
What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?
Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.
For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller
Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.
For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel
Sunday Inspiration. Post by David Joel Miller.
Sunlight
Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.
Benjamin Franklin
“Stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight.”
Gordon B. Hinckley
“Birds sing after a storm; why shouldn’t people feel as free to delight in whatever sunlight remains to them?”
Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy
Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
Sunday Inspiration. Post by David Joel Miller.
Cheerfulness.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
“Cheerfulness, it would appear,
is a matter which depends fully as much on the state
of things within,
as on the state of things without and around us.”
― Charlotte Brontë
“I love those who can smile in trouble…”
― Leonardo da Vinci
“It takes no more time to see the good side of life than to see the bad.”
― Jimmy Buffett
Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Today seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you, please share them.
Sunday Inspiration Post By David Joel Miller.
Happy Valentine’s Day.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
Happy Valentine’s Day.
“A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.”
― Elbert Hubbard
“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
― Lao Tzu
Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Sunday seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you please share them.
Sunday Inspiration Post By David Joel Miller.
Joy.
Joy Grows
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
“We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves.”
Guatama Buddha
“Joy springs from within; no one makes you joyous; you choose joyfulness.”
Unknown
“True joy results when we become aware of our connectedness to everything.”
Paul Pearsall
Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Sunday seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you please share them.
Sunday Inspiration Post By David Joel Miller.
Fun.
Fun.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
When was the last time you had this much fun?
Wanted to share some inspirational quotes with you. Sunday seemed like a good time to do this. If any of these quotes strike a chord with you please share them.
By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.
Today is going to be a good day.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
Would you recognize a great day if you had one? We humans frequently have a mental bias that results in us seeing the bad and missing the good. If all you look for are the things that went wrong today, over time you will come to think that all days are bad ones and that your life is destined to become unhappy.
If you start looking for the positive experiences in life you will find that every day there are random positive events going on in your life largely unnoticed. Try doing some investigative work and finding these positive events for a more positive life. Here is my list of things you may have missed that could point to your having more good days than you are recognizing.
Did your child, partner, or pet greet you this morning? Did they say something to you when you got home? When we are rushing from place to place and person to person we can miss those in our day who were glad to see us.
Did you get a smile or a good morning from a coworker? Did you return that greeting? Work can be stressful at times but watch for those who are positive and glad to see you. Recognizing this greeting can set the tone for the rest of your day.
What about pets? Was there a dog that wagged his tail for you today? Did you stop to pet that creature? Did you get a cat purr? Purring for cats is the equivalent of an audible smile. Make sure you acknowledge that pet of yours. They are wishing you a great day if only you could stop to notice.
Earning a living can be stressful and make you anxious sometimes. If you have a job you like make sure you notice this and be thankful for it. If you love what you do it can bring joy and happiness to your life. Don’t like what you do? Think about how you can change jobs, start a new career, or look for ways to change your attitude towards the job you do have.
Are there things at home you like to do? People, you enjoy being with? Why or why not? You work for a living, coming home should not be a chore. If it is, take another look at what you are doing and why. There is no point in putting off being happy to earn a living so you can go home and be unhappy.
Work on your relationships. Get professional help if need be. Look at some blog posts. There have been several on counselorssoapbox on improving your relationships. Do you put the same effort into making your relationships work that you put into building a career? Unhappiness at home carries over into the world of work.
If you enjoy learning then every day is a chance to learn something new. Those new ideas can go unnoticed in the pile of things we call our “to do” lists. Make it a rule to learn something new each day. Ask your partner or children what they learned today. Share what you learned. See how you can grow and become a better person each and every day.
Problems crop up all the time. You spend most of your day moving from issue to issue. The end result of all this problem solving is to develop a “problem-saturated” story of your life. Before long you can think that your whole life is one problem after another.
Did you forget all the problems you have solved? Most of us overcome a host of problems each and every day. What we may fail to do is to think back over the day and recognize those successes. Give yourself credit for things that you accomplished. Give yourself a mental round of applause. See you may be a fantastic problem solver, but if all you are remembering is that you faced problems today rather than remembering the ones you solved, life can look like one giant problem.
It is easy to drift into the habit of measuring the day based on what we have and what we receive rather than on the time we were able to be of service. Research has found that doing for others can result in significantly more happiness than being selfish and doing only for yourself.
Have you ever done anything in your life for a child or someone who really needed help? How did that make you feel? Did that child “get over on you” or did it feel good to help someone who needed your help?
If feeling good is so happy-making, why do we all resist being of service to others? Try looking for ways you can do for others and that doing will result in a happier you. Why not be really selfish and do all you can to be of service to others today?
Now that you look at it, was today a better day than you originally thought? What other ways might daily happiness be going unnoticed and unrecorded?
For more on this topic see the other counselorssoapbox.com post under Happiness.
Staying connected with David Joel Miller
Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!
My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.
Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.
Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.
As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.
Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.
Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.
Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.
Planned Accidents The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.
Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.
What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?
Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.
For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller
Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.
For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel
By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.
Happiness.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
We hear that money can’t buy happiness but we all know that a lack of money can bring you down.
Turns out that happy people are more successful in life, but success, especially money, does not by itself make you happy.
Here are some things that are free but can greatly improve your happiness if only you would use them.
Spending more time outside, in nature makes people happy. The beach, the mountains, almost any place but the city makes most people feel happy. Despite all our desires to have bigger houses and more things, being away from those things man makes has turned out to make people happy in study after study.
Plan a trip to the country. Visit a local park or just walk along some local streets. Make sure you pay attention to the trees, the birds, and the flowers to increase your happiness.
The ideal happy temperature is 57 degrees Fahrenheit.
Walking can improve your mood as well as, sometimes more than, most medications. A goal of many treatments for depression is to get people to the point that they are able to get up and get moving.
Exercise does not need to be strenuous to make you happy. Just simply moving around can begin the process. Consider taking up yoga. Look for events that get you moving. Sharing that exercise with other people can increase the happiness benefits.
Most of us are chronically sleep-deprived. Not enough sleep results in depression, poor memory, and impaired learning abilities. Sleep is not a bank account where you make a deposit one night a week and then live off that sleep all week. Think of sleep more like food you need to eat a healthy diet every day rather than bingeing on food.
There is one form of depression in which people eat and spend too much time trying to sleep, that is not because of too much sleep. What happens is that when depressed you may find it difficult to get out of bed and do anything. If you are in bed a lot of hours and still feel tired try getting up and doing something and see if your mood doesn’t improve.
Spending time with family and friends should not cost you. If it is, take another look at that relationship. The more time you spend with others the more likely you are to create a happy life.
Friends can give your happiness a real boost. Don’t have many friends you can spend time with? Get involved in something and you will make new friends. Most friendships begin around shared activates. You make friends at school, your place of religious practice or the places you do your sports and hobbies. Join a group, take up a new activity, look for ways to meet new people, and in the process, you can make some new friends.
Holding on to the past, ruminating about those things that made you unhappy in the past is a sure way to prevent happiness in the present. Let the past go and you will see improvements in the now.
Hard to stop thinking about the negative? Train your brain to avoid those repetitive memories. When your thoughts head down a bad street, tell your mind to knock that off. Make a conscious effort to stay in the now and focus on the positive. What you look for expands. Look for happiness.
Being around happy people makes you happy. Read funny things, watch happy videos, and laugh all you can. Share those cute-cat-videos with your social media friends. Spread wanton happiness wherever you go.
Slow your pace down and savor the happiness you do find.
Happiness is all around you but may go unnoticed if you are not on the lookout. Just like people watch for birds and find them, you need to be on the lookout for happiness and throughout your day you are likely to see small snippets of happy all around you.
This may not be totally free but it is certainly reasonably priced for most people. Having an animal in your life makes us all feel a little more loved. Get a dog, a cat, or some other creature and see if your happiness does not improve.
The size or breed does not appear to make a difference. You do need to think ahead though because while you may get a pet for little or no outlay over their life they will require some food and other expenditures.
Being of service can boost your happiness. Recovering people know that happiness is one of those things you need to give away to keep. Anytime you have done something for another, not for what you will get out of them but for the sheer pleasure of being helpful, you will become happier.
A warning. Do not do for others expecting them to appreciate you. Things done because you want others to like you will leave you feeling cheated when others do not appreciate what you have done as much as you expected. Things done for the pleasure of doing them always pay dividends.
There is my list of mostly free ways to increase your happiness in the place you find yourself. Being happy where you are has some side effects. You may find yourself more energetic and productive and your life may start to change for the better.
Staying connected with David Joel Miller
Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!
My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.
Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.
Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.
As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.
Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.
Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.
Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.
Planned Accidents The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.
Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.
What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?
Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.
For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller
Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.
For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel
By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.
Happiness Diet
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com
This time of year resolutions is almost gone. The plans to diet, exercise, and self-improve are almost out of season now. Did you start out saying this was the year you went on a high happiness diet? How are you doing on creating that happy life? Many of the same things that make diets successful will make that happy life project work better also.
Cutting out junk food will improve your physical health. What are the junk things you are doing that are keeping you unhappy? Are there activities or people that you need to get out of your life to create a happier you?
If you don’t clean out the garbage in your house your living space becomes unhealthy. There are probably things in all our emotional lives that need tossing out. Get rid of excess anger and ruminations to make room for happy experiences.
You need to eat every day. For a happy life take in some happiness each and every day. You need to eat a sensible diet every day. For the maximum happy life, you will need to incorporate small doses of happiness every day.
Do not think that one huge dose of happiness will satisfy you for the rest of your life. Watch for the small things that build your healthy happiness. That good job or new relationship may make you happy for a while but you will need to maintain that relationship and keep up a positive view of that job or soon those things that were supposed to make you happy will fade into extra weight around your emotional middle.
Binge eating is bad for your physical health. Bingeing on negative thoughts is bad for both your mental health and your physical health. You can’t load up on negativity and unhappy thinking all day and then expect one positive event to make your day happy.
To build a happy life you need to consume small snacks of happiness all day long. Don’t waste time on negativity. Solve the problems that can be solved and accept the things that are out of your control.
Watch for the little things in life that bring the smiles. Laugh a little at frequent intervals.
There are those things that can pretend to make you happy, the happiness imposters. Drugs, alcohol, and lots of selfish pursuits try to pretend they will make you happy. Really happiness grows from using positive, safe coping tools each and every day.
If you run by those bursts of happy feelings you will miss them. Do things that make you happy. Appreciate those things. Repeat as needed.
Constant measuring, asking if you are happy enough, can impede the growth of real happiness. Focus on maximizing your happiness not measuring it. Do not dwell on what is missing in your life. Make plans to fill up those shortages and then focus on the journey.
Too much checking the map can keep you from making progress on the journey of life. Take those periodic inventories of your life, but day-to-day keep working on making progress on your goals.
Do not put off being happy till later. Spend a few minutes each morning telling yourself that some good things will happen today. Watch for the things that make your day better. Say nice things to yourself.
What things can you do for yourself each day that makes you happy? Pet the dog or cat and tell them that it is nice to see them.
Work small rituals and routines that increase your happiness into your day. Say an affirmation, make yourself a treat. Schedule time for a cute-cat-video to start your day.
Practice your religious or spiritual tradition. Say Hi to your higher power and expect that you will get a Hi and some love back. Prayers do not need to be long or complicated to keep you in touch with your source of strength and love.
What small thing could you do each day to get your day off to a great start?
Do not let sad feelings, loneliness, or depression take over control of your life. Do learn to listen to your feelings. If something is not making you happy ask yourself why? Is this about the thing, the job, the relationship, or is it about me?
Unhappy people are unhappy everywhere no matter what happens. Happy people grow that happiness and weed out the things that are sapping the strength from their life.
Being happy is not a result of chance. People win the lottery and still many are not happy. Love comes and it goes. Wherever you go, you are there. Learn the skill of seeing the best in the situation you are in while working towards having the life you want.
Happiness is not a destination; it is a lifetime journey.
Staying connected with David Joel Miller
Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!
My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.
Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.
Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.
As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.
Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.
Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.
Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.
Planned Accidents The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.
Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.
What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?
Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.
For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller
Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.
For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel
counselorssoapbox 