Category Archives: Commentary

Want to write a post for counselorssoapbox?

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By David Joel Miller

Man writing

Writing.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Interested in writing a counselorssoapbox post?

People who have lived with and overcome a life problem have a lot to share. We refer to that sometimes as lived experience. That perspective teaches you things that you can’t always learn in other ways.

I wanted to throw an opportunity out there for those of you who read this blog. If you have something to say but haven’t found a way to say it yet, I invite you to consider writing an article for this blog. Whether you currently have a blog, or this is the one and only time you are planning to write something you are welcome.

My plan is not to change the blog to an article one, but it might be fun to share some things written by others from time to time. Frankly, this may also help me by keeping the blog going with fresh posts during those times when my other activities keep me from writing.

In all fairness, I need to tell you what sort of articles I am looking for. The main focus of this blog is and will remain on having a happy life. I strongly believe in recovery, that people do not need to stay stuck in their illness forever and that they can and do get better and go on to have happy fulfilled lives. What that means to each of you may be a quite different thing.

Many of the posts I write are about mental and emotional illnesses, substance abuse, and their co-occurrence. Some posts have been about counseling and therapy. Related to those topics are self-improvement, parenting, and relationships.

What I most would like to hear about is not the daily problems but the daily successes. If you went for counseling, what worked and what did not work. If something else was helpful, what was it and how might others make use of the resource you found?

Even if you did not have a problem that got a diagnosis but you found a way to overcome that issue I would love to hear from you.

If there was a particular book or exercise that you have done that led to your growth and learning, by all means, share that also.

Professionals are welcome to join in this opportunity. Many professionals are themselves in recovery or have had to do a lot of work on themselves to get to the point they could be helpful to others. We also find we learn a lot from our clients. So if you would like to share those lessons learns, by all means, send them along, just please be sure, as I know you are aware, not to share anything that would violate someone else’s confidentiality, privilege, or otherwise get us in trouble.

Articles for consideration should be from 500 to 1,200 words and positive or constructive in nature. As the author and editor of this blog, I reserve the right to reject anything that does not fit with what I am trying to do on this blog and to make small edits as needed. I would ask the author before making any big changes in what you write. I also reserve the right to reuse your article or quote from it in other things that I am writing.

If you send pictures, make sure they are not copyrighted or I can locate a picture to add to your article. At this point, my blog is not big enough to pay for submissions but in exchange for your contribution, I can offer you a byline.

These articles should be original, not something already posted to another blog. Most bloggers know how to reblog and we all do that from time to time but for this submit-an-article program, I am looking for new and different points of view.

Whether you have written a lot of posts or this is the one and only one you will write all submissions are welcome.

This is not something that needs to be done right away, I have posts scheduled to appear for a few weeks yet but I find those who say they want to write but never get started never get them written. If you have an idea let me know and we can plan for a future date for your post to appear.

So if the idea of being a writer whose article is featured on counselorssoapbox appeals to you or you just have a burning desire to say something contact me and let’s see if this is something that could happen.

You are of course always welcome and encouraged to leave a comment on anything that is posted even if you chose not to write a long post.

Here is hoping that you all will continue to read counselorssoapbox and that some of you will decide to write an article for the blog.

Thanks for reading,

David Joel Miller, LMFT, LPCC

Related articles

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

counselorssoapbox.com most read posts – March 2013

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Counselorssoapbox.com

counselorssoapbox.com most-read posts March 2013

By David Joel Miller.

Here are the most-read posts here at counselorssoapbox.com  for the month of March 2013.

How much should you tell a therapist? 

Is nicotine a stimulant or a depressant?

What is the difference between Depression and Major Depressive Disorder?

Do people really forget what happened when drinking? – Blackouts

Levels or types of Borderline Personality Disorder  

Which border is Borderline Intellectual Functioning on?    

Why can’t we forget the painful past?

Do therapists have to report a crime?

6 ways to recover from Complex Trauma or Complex PTSD   

Are you Hyperthymic?

Thanks to all of you who have read a post, become a follower, and especially an extra helping of thanks to those who have left a like or comment.

Thanks again.

David Joel Miller

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Do the mentally ill go to jail? Should they?

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By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

To the mentally ill go to jail?
Picture courtesy of Pixabay

Why do so many mentally ill people end up in jail?

Mentally ill people are not supposed to end up in jail simply because they are mentally ill. Unfortunately, our jails and prisons are clogging up with the mentally ill because our systems can’t always find appropriate housing and treatment options.

At this point, I need to point out that we are finding more and more that there are NOT two distinct groups – the mentally ill and the “Normal People.”  People with mental illness can have episodes where they get better or worse. Some mentally ill do recovery. There are also a lot of people who look normal for most of their life and then something happens that they can’t cope with and they find themselves in the mentally ill group.

The person who finds out their partner is cheating may “flip out.” And show up at that worksite with a gun. Before they found out about the affair they were apparently normal people but once they start shooting up the workplace they get reclassified as “mentally ill.” In that respect, people with long-term mental illnesses get a bad rap. The chronically mentally ill are more likely to be victimized than to attack others. They are also way more likely to get murdered than to kill anyone.

There are three principal reasons that law enforcement comes in contact with the mentally ill.

1. The person is thinking of harming themselves or they are so disabled they can’t care for themselves.

While completing suicide is illegal in most places, the person who has tried to kill themselves really does not belong in jail.

Most places have a system called involuntary commitment that allows this person to be placed in a mental hospital BRIEFLY for observation and treatment. Unfortunately, once they stop wanting to kill themselves they get released. We can offer services but it is difficult to impossible to make that person stay in treatment for any length of time.

Additionally, in far too many places there is a shortage of resources for these people and often waiting times to access services.

Just because the person is suicidal does not make this an easy situation for first responders. The suicidal person may harm a bystander in their efforts to end their life, especially if authorities try to stop this attempt. There is also the risk that they will threaten law enforcement, resulting in the increasingly more common “suicide-by-cop.”

2. They are doing something illegal or causing someone a problem.

Police encounter the mentally ill in all sorts of situations. They try to sleep in people’s yards and use their water. Unfortunately, there are a whole lot of mentally ill that have ended up homeless. Add together the distortions in thinking that come from their disorder and the life skills homeless people need to develop to get by and they come into conflict with authority a lot.

When the mentally ill get too loud, don’t move along when told to do so, or act hostile and scare someone, the police get called. Usually, after a confrontation, the only alternative is to take them in.

Even if the police would prefer to not keep this person many communities just have no other place to house them. So minor lawbreakers, vagrants, petty shoplifters, and the like, with mental illnesses, end up in jail for a period of time.

Sheriffs from two of our larger American cities have been quoted recently as saying they are now the largest residential housing facility for the mentally ill in their state. There just is no place to put many of these folks.

3. They are under the influence of drugs and alcohol.

Anyone who does drugs and alcohol to excess can have a problem. The mentally ill are at high risk to abuse substances. In our American culture, those without a diagnosed mental illness are also at high risk to abuse substances.

There is a huge overlap between mental illness and substance abuse. Some mentally ill use alcohol or drugs to mask their symptoms while others started out drinking and drugging and now have developed symptoms of a mental health disorder as a result of their substance abuse.

It is also worth noting that a whole lot of people are in jail for drug and alcohol-related offenses. Those who are fortunate enough to end up in rehab programs are often found to have a mental or emotional disorder.

Incarcerating people in jails has not been working to reduce either mental illness or substance abuse. More treatment options are desperately needed.

Shockingly the most common response from the politicians and the general public is to get tough on all these people and lock them up. The proponents of more incarceration hold that view until they or someone in their family ends up in jail or prison and then they ask why there were not more treatment options available earlier.

Related articles

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Are Wiccans Schizoid? Are African-Americans?

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By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

Who is Schizoid?

These kinds of search questions come up periodically. Sometimes I feel like these questions need to be answered even at the risk of making some people mad. I think we need to look at Schizoid personality disorder and other psychosis and its relationship to religious and racial minorities even at the risk of making a whole lot of people angry.

Wow, religion and race in one post, guaranteed to piss someone off!

Particular religious groups have been connected with various mental illnesses from time to time. In fact, even in professional trainings, Wiccans, members of a particular recognized religion, get connected with mental illness especially Schizoid personality disorder or Schizotypal disorder frequently. There was a time that minority races were mostly considered to suffer from mental illnesses also.

So first let’s look at what is Schizoid personality disorder and then why races and religions get connected to particular disorders.

At this point, before the hate mail starts arriving, I would like to point out, for better or worse, that I do indeed know people; some yes are even friends, of both the Wiccan and the African-American persuasions. As an aside I have also made the acquaintance of a few assorted Muslims, Christians, Atheists, Israelis, Palestinians, an Icelander, and one person who might be described as a genetic Republican. Most of whom I consider more or less friends through no fault of theirs. I have left a few others out of this post because I could not spell their race or religion.

This issue of who or what is Schizoid is somewhat clouded by the way in which classification of personality disorders will change when the DSM-5 comes out in May. Some disorders stay, some go and then we reenter the whole question of are any diagnosis real? This is the old Categories versus dimensions controversy. Some people clearly have enough symptoms to get a diagnosis but what about people with only a few symptoms are they normal? Do they have a slight disorder? Or will we need to create a billion or so individual symptom severities to fit each and every one? I will leave that one to the authors of the DSM-5.

DSM-5 update.

Mostly they left the personality disorders alone.

What we currently think of as Schizoid personality characteristics is a person who:

Is detached from social relationships and has a restricted range of expressing emotions in interpersonal situations, and this has been going on since they reached adulthood. (I am crudely paraphrasing from the DSM-4-TR here) and they have 4 or 7 characteristics listed below and they do not have another mental illness that explains their symptoms.

You math majors out there will note that 4 of 7 symptoms allows for 840 possible combinations of symptoms. We clinician types also get to interpret whether you have or do not have any one of these symptoms which can result in a lot of disagreement between clinicians.

The seven symptoms to choose from are:

1. Does not enjoy or want close relationships including being part of a family

In addition to schizoid personality disorder this might fit people who have faced abuse or discrimination and as a result, avoid close relationships.

2. Almost always chooses solitary activities

These criteria could also fit gamers and those who are addicted to the internet.

3. Has little interest in having sex.

This could be the result of past aversive experiences.

4. Takes pleasure in few if any activities

This sounds a bit like depression so does the lack of interest in sex above, this will make it harder but not impossible for gamers to get this diagnosis.

5. Lacks friends other than first-degree family members.

Lots of victims of discrimination and immigrants could fit this criterion.

6. Appears indifferent to praise or criticism of others.

This fits lots of people with learned helplessness and those who live in non-affirming environments. Why seek praise or affirmation if when you expose your emotional self you will not be liked for who you are.

7. Shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affect.

People who face discrimination may hide their true selves and restrict their emotions in public situations. If you get abused for your differentness you may keep your feelings inside even at home.

Now someone with a true personality disorder has these symptoms, most or all of them all the time and not just when in social settings. But can you see how someone who has faced discrimination or is a member of a religion with unusual beliefs could try to avoid expressing those feelings around others who might attack or punish you for being who you are?

Can you see how mental health could be used to punish people who were different racially or religiously and then when they try to keep who they are a secret to avoid that discrimination they could be labeled withdrawn and uninterested in others?

Sure some people with certain mental illnesses could be attracted to certain religious or political causes, but to move over into thinking that people of any one religion or race are probably suffering from any one mental illness is wrong and potentially dangerous.

Besides, I think the people who wrote these search terms probably had Schizoid personality disorder and Schizotypal personality disorder confused. Schizotypal probably fits some rock and rollers and celebrities better than it fits Wiccan and African-Americans but it also gets thrown on anyone who is different way too often.

Schizotypal people wear funny clothing like straw hats and suspenders – or are those farmers? See how easy it is to think that people who are different from you must be sick in some way?

Before we start thinking that people who are different must somehow be mentally ill, think back to those basic criteria. Does this person’s problem or behavior interfere with their ability to work, have friends and family or does it upset them? If not they shouldn’t get a mental health diagnosis just because they are different.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Which presidents get a birthday party?

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By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

It is Presidents Day in the U. S. but why?

Today is the day we here in the United States celebrate “Presidents Day.” We are not the only country to celebrate the birthday of a president, patriot or king. Every day of the year appears to be a holiday to celebrate something somewhere.

This day could also be a Presidents day of sorts in Mexico where on this day in 1913 – Pedro Lascuráin became President of Mexico for 45 minutes; this is the shortest term to date of any person as president of any country. (See Wikipedia for that one.)

As a side note, this is also the date in history when the Chicago Seven were found not guilty. Anyone want to celebrate Chicago and 1968 again?

Today is also the birthday of Queen Mary I of England, Sri Ramakrishna, and a gazillion other famous people. Too many famous people died on this date to begin to list.

February 18th is women’s day in Iran which probably ties in nicely with including the great emancipator Lincoln in with the guests of honor for this birthday celebration.

Why is today, February 18th, 2013, and not some other day, Presidents Day here in the U. S.?

Originally this started as two separate celebrations, Washington’s Birthday which falls on February 22, and Lincoln’s Birthday which falls on February 12th.

For the record, George Washington was born on February 11, 1731, but the calendar was changed in 1752 and his new birthday became February 22, 1732. All this happened before we became an independent country and began to muck-around with holidays and things.

This part is very confusing if you let accuracy influence you.

In 1971 the Uniform Mondays Holidays Act moved Washington’s Birthday to the Monday between February 15th and February 22. Thank goodness he was not around then to have to learn a new birthday. This results in his birthday never being celebrated on his original birthday and only very rarely falling on his second revised birthday. Leave it to the government to muddy up even the Founding Fathers’ birthday.

So far the U. S. has had 44 presidents. Surely some of them deserve a day also? Historians repeatedly have ranked Franklin Roosevelt and Thomas Jefferson among the top U. S. presidents. It hardly seems fair that neither of them gets a birthday party.

Will Rogers was known to remark that this country’s greatest president was Calvin Coolidge because, while he didn’t do anything, no one wanted him to do anything either. Some of our current politicians should take a page from old Calvin’s

Some of our current politicians should take a page from old Calvin’s playbook. Why doesn’t he get a birthday holiday?

But then I suppose that if we were to start adding holidays willy-nilly every time some great event happens eventually we would all be off work every day and no one would ever work at all unless they were getting double time for working on a holiday.

This holiday should be set aside to remember all 44 of those guys who did the job of president. While we are remembering them consider also the thousands of people who started out to run for those 44 top spots and the millions who have said they could do a better job if they got the chance.

But then President Kennedy is reported as saying that no one should be too harsh in their judgment of a president if they had not sat behind that desk and make those decisions.

While I am not sure completely which presidents we should be honoring today I am quite sure this day should be about a whole lot more than a used car sale or some new furniture.

Regardless of who your country’s leader is just now let’s all think today about what it means to lead a people and to want better for them than what they have.

The great ones, like Washington, Lincoln, Jefferson, Roosevelt, and the others, get remembered for what they did for their country not what they got out of the gig for themselves.

You may not be president or prime minister, but what could you be doing today to help someone else? Helping others, being of service, and remembering those who served is what this day should be about.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Lincoln visits Mardi Gras

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By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

Abraham Lincoln

Abraham Lincoln.
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Why these holidays are getting me confused.

My calendar shows that this year Lincoln’s Birthday and Mardi Gras fall on the same day. The juxtaposition has me wondering more than ever about holidays, what they mean anymore, and why they keep changing.

This getting old has its disadvantages, one of which is that I am in a perpetual state of confusion. I might get even more confused if I keep trying to make sense of all this instead of just observing and reflecting on this occurrence.

Do Lincoln’s birthday and Mardi Gras have any connection? Why are they together and the president’s birthday a full seven days later?

One connection clearly is the occurrence of hallucinations. In that way, the two days have something in common. They both also remind us that the modern idea of hallucinations and delusions and the ancient belief in spirits and demons are not all that far apart.

There has been some debate over the years about the state of President Lincoln’s mental health. Clearly, he presided over our country at a very perilous and traumatic time. No war in our history from the colonial days till now has resulted in such universal military service and such horrific loss of life as that war which was fought to keep the union of states together despite unresolvable, for the times, differences.

Lincoln has been described as Melancholy, an old name for what we now call Major Depressive Disorder. Some accounts report he would stay up late at night and believed he saw spirits. Having to make the sort of decisions he did that resulted in such massive suffering, no doubt could drive most any man insane.

So a reasonable case could be made that this President whose policy’s made such profound changes in so many aspects of American life, could easily have suffered from depression with psychotic features, or Bipolar disorder, some have even suggested a more pronounced psychosis. Still, with or without a mental illness, this president was in touch with massive sadness and the mental images of the spirits of those who died in that war.

Personally, from this distance of 150 years, I can tell you that the number of family members on my tree who fought in that great war is too many to count. I also know, though in a more fragmentary manner that many of those ancestors and their offspring developed an addiction to drugs, alcoholism, and a wide variety of serious mental illnesses in the years following that war.

I am not sure we can blame all the insanity in the family tree on that one war, like all families we had black sheep and bizarre behavior before and after that war. But the connections are too specific and close in time for me to not take notice that the effects a horrific war play on the psyche of individuals, families, and countries for a long time after a war officially ends.

As for Mardi Gras, the costumes involved look to me like a tangible representation of a Jungian dream analysis on Hallucinogenic drugs.

My understanding of Mardi Gras is of course imperfect. The most vivid description of this day I recall must have come from a person who had consumed several bottles of high-proof liquor. It is hard sometimes to tell the descriptive part from the current hallucinations.

I am told that his Mardi Gras falls on “Fat Tuesday.” This is the last Tuesday before Lent. Those of the Catholic Influence seem particularly inclined towards lent. I am told that the objective is to get as much sinning done on Fat Tuesday as possible so that you have the pleasure to carry you through the deprivations of Lent.

This did not sound right to me but my highly intoxicated source swears that this is true. He also swears that extraterrestrial aliens have taken over the bodies of our Congress and are passing pro-alien laws.

I found the part about congressmen being possessed by extraterrestrials easier to believe than his account of Mardi Gras, so much for drunken sources.

Participants in Mari Gras wear odd costumes that make them look like, demons, spirits, and assorted creatures. Creecy as quoted in Wikipedia, a customarily sober if not totally reliable source, describes the Mardi Gras costumes as:

grotesque, quizzical, diabolic, horrible, strange masks, and disguises. Human bodies are seen with heads of beasts and birds, beasts and birds with human heads; demi-beasts, demi-fishes, snakes’ heads and bodies with arms of apes; man-bats from the moon; mermaids; satyrs, beggars, monks, and robbers parade and march on foot, on horseback, in wagons, carts, coaches, cars, &c., in rich confusion, up and down the streets, wildly shouting, singing, laughing, drumming, fiddling, fifeing, and all throwing flour broadcast as they wend their reckless way.

Somehow this time of year seems perfect for the strange, bizarre, and the supernatural. Only a short time ago we were watching a groundhog for our weather predictions. Now we are all hoping to get in one last round of sinning before we try giving up our old ways for another brief hiatus. This only days after discarding our New Year’s resolutions.

Which raises the question, “Can you still see the bare breasts, bizarre behavior, and debauchery if you are sober?”

As to the connection between Mardi Gras and Lincoln?

I am inclined to think that Lincoln would have preferred to see this menagerie traipsing through the white house over the specter of the war dead and wounded he had to view in his melancholy nights.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Did we lose another war? How many wars has America lost? What is a war anyway?

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By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

Child crying

Why can’t we forget the painful past?
Photo courtesy of Pixabay

When is a war not a war?

We have fought a war on poverty, a war on illiteracy, and a war on drugs while sending troops all over the globe to fight “police actions” and provide “military advisers.” When is a war a war and when is it not?

The word “WAR” has been applied to so many efforts that it is beginning to lose its meaning. I am getting confused about which actions are wars and which are not.

Have we lost count of how many wars we have lost?

Does it occur to politicians that by calling every effort to right a social ill a war, while removing that label from actual military combat we are somehow trying to sanitize our news and as a result, we are debasing the service of our military?

I will defer judgment on foreign military combat and leave those evaluations to the historians.

What I am reasonably sure of is that when it comes to these domestic “wars” while we have won a few battles we have clearly lost all these wars.

The war on poverty ended without so much as an armistice. I am not sure if there was ever an official end, but we seem to have recalled all out troops and left the spoils of riches to the robber barons that are now colonizing the big banks and the insider trading battalions.

Clearly, the platoons of the homeless are growing. In the ultimate irony, many military veterans have been enlisted in the armies of the homeless, the addicted, and the mentally ill.

Of all these lost wars the cruelest defeats have come in the wars on addiction and mental illness.

Rather than a frontal attack on the diseases of addiction and mental illness we have attached the addicts, alcoholics, and the mentally ill.

Millions for arrest and incarceration but not one penny for treatment has been our leader’s slogan. What money there has been for the mentally ill has largely gone for systems and staff to manage their lives and keep them trapped in their illness rather than efforts to return them, to functional lives.

It is easy to get room and board in a jail or prison or medical insurance and a poverty-level wage on disability but it is hard to get into programs that allow the mentally ill to work part-time without losing their medical coverage.

Our prisons are full and overflowing, our disability rolls are swelling, but we refuse to believe in recovery and rehabilitation that might allow the mentally ill and the addicted to recover and return to a useful role in society.

After every horrific crime, the shootings, the violence, we hear calls to find those “bad” people, round them up, and put them away.

This false belief that there are two kinds of people, the good and the bad, has kept us looking for an easy solution to make us feel safe while avoiding the hard work of identifying the causes of violence and designing programs to prevent people from resorting to violent acts.

Like the magician pointing to one thing to keep people’s eyes off the real action, our society looks in the wrong places for the roots of violence.

The majority of molestations are perpetrated by family members, not strangers. The person just fired or served with divorce papers is more likely to bring a gun to work and shoot people than the seriously mentally ill. More children die at home each year, shot by a parent then will die in school shootings.

Among the poor and the unemployed mental illness is common. If you weren’t depressed before you lost your job a few years of trying to live on government handouts will make you doubt your sanity.

If we want to make any real progress in the “wars” on addiction and mental illness we need to get serious about providing timely treatment for anyone who wants and needs treatment.

Treatment of at-risk children in the third grade is a lot less expensive than building more prison cells. Providing treatment on request for addicted people is cheaper than arrest and incarceration.

So far we seem to be losing the war on action and mental illness but we shouldn’t give up. The efforts need not be over.

A war is not a war when we shrink from the challenge.

Related articles

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel

Study

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Interesting study. This may explain why so many studies in the past came up with different conclusions.

waywardweed's avatarWaywardweed's Blog

Link to an article on the Brain and Behavior Research Foundation website: another piece of the puzzle:

http://beforeitsnews.com/science-and-technology/2013/01/researchers-discover-the-genomic-mechanism-behind-schizophrenia-2527808.html

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MLK Day – Obama Inauguration – What a trip!

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By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

MLJ Day 2015

Today we celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. Day

We didn’t think we would see this.

We have come so far to get to today. We have so far left to go. I have some very conflicted feelings on this historic day. I did not expect to see this.

Let me begin by saying that this year I officially become an old person, at least by some government standards. Like all old people, I have seen a lot of change in my life. Some of it good and some bad. I did not think I would live to see some of this!

Today I feel more proud of my country than ever before. Not that we have solved our problems, but because we have the courage to face them. Some will suggest that my optimism is the beginning of senile dementia. Let’s hope not.

There are plenty of reasons for me to be sad and pessimistic about this country’s future. But there are also good reasons for me to feel hope.

My generation watched us put a man on the moon. When I was born antibiotics were not widely available and there was no polio vaccine. I saw my grandparents get an indoor bathroom and running water instead of an outhouse and a pump.

We also witnessed the assassinations of John Kennedy, Martin Luther King, and Robert Kennedy. It seemed like anyone who spoke out for the good was overwhelmed by the bad.

We witnessed the shootings at Kent State, American soldiers shooting college students who were protesting the war. There was the trial of the Chicago Seven, a diverse group that had taken the protests to the Democratic National Convention.

Brave young men went off to war to defend our country. We were told that was why they were going. They have continued to be sent off to war and they still come home to less than their sacrifices deserve. We wanted to end the practice of sending so many of America’s best off to fight wars, some of which made little sense. They continue to fight. We could not curb our countries appetite for foreign incursions.

There were protest marches and civil rights marches, mostly in the south, and more African-Americans could vote. There were some people, black and white, who were killed for trying to register people to vote. There were church bombings.

But the voters did get registered and they did vote. And then those who only a short time before had no voice in the process, the poor and the minorities, they began to run for office. We hoped that change could come.

Very distantly, as if through a dark pair of sunglasses I remember a time when I saw a place with two bathrooms, one for whites and a separate building for “coloreds.” And there was school desegregation. There were sit-ins at lunch counters and places that refused service because of your skin color or what you wore.

The law no longer sanctions these practices. I wish I could say that it no longer occurs. The making folks unwelcome is subtler now.

When I went to high school we got into fights sometimes. You used your fists and the first time you got suspended for three days. Today kids bring guns to school and they shoot each other. We also expel kids for bringing a plastic knife in their lunch. Zero tolerance may make us feel safer but more kids are dying at school, at home, and in their neighborhoods.

I did not believe that a major political party would nominate a person of color, but they did. Nor did I expect that my country would elect a person of color to the presidency, not yet, not so soon, not in my lifetime. But we did. Not once but twice.

At first some of the older white folk, we tried to explain this away. He wasn’t black, they would say. He is biracial some said. We can claim him too. I like to think that he is a lot like me, an American first, with some Irish blood thrown in, just like me. But there is something different, very, very different about President Obama’s election.

There was a time when any black blood made you black. And to be white you needed all white blood. It is clearer now than before that most people of color have some white blood in them. We have also learned that those of us that used to think of ourselves as “white,” we all have a whole lot of nationalities and races on our family trees.

This country has learned to accept our president as Black because that is what he says he is. More and more people have come to see him as a loyal American who wants only the best for our country and who represents us all regardless of our race or religion.

There are people who resist this new era. It would be comforting to think that all people like me are good and all others are bad. This leads to hating other races, religions, styles of dress, and even music preferences. Some continue to dismiss others because to accept them would be threatening. But we have moved forward, some for better and some for worse.

My generation has also left an evil legacy. We thought that drugs were good. The pharmaceutical companies told us they had a drug for everything. We tried drugs for expanding consciousness and drugs to make you happy. In the end, what we found was that the over-dependence on drugs made you addicted.

The list of problems ahead is endless.

We have not curbed war. We have an epidemic of addiction. We have not yet faced the prevalence of mental illness, nor have we mustered up the will to work on this problem.

Violence permeates our country. Daily our people are shot and killed at work, on the streets, and at home. We have not altered the face or the existence of poverty.

More kids drop out of school and advanced education is becoming more unaffordable at a time that our future demands a highly educated workforce.  Our economic leaders look more like robbers than protectors of money, stealing the savings of the elderly to pay themselves bonuses while their company loses money.

It would be easy to see the future as bleak. But on this one day, we can tell ourselves that some of those dreams we dreamt way back when, some of those dreams, they have come true.

2012 Yearend Wrap up – End of the world, unhappiness and what comes next

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Counselorssoapbox.com

12-31-12

By David Joel Miller, MS, Licensed Therapist & Licensed Counselor.

This has been some year. For good or bad it is now almost over. Some awful things occurred this year and some wonderful things. Hidden in the gloom of the year past there just may have been some seeds of things to come, which were planted this year. We will need to nurture some of those seeds in the years to come.

Some of the seeds from the past, like violence, need to be weeded out of our future.

Thanks to those of you who have been reading counselorssoapbox through this year. This was the first full year of this blog. Over that year I have learned to do a lot of things that we not even on my “to do” list a year ago. Hopefully, this old dog can continue to learn a few new tricks.

Readership on counselorssoapbox has risen from one or two people a day to hundreds. Some of you have “liked” my posts and some of you have disagreed, which is as it should be.

About that end of the world stuff.

Personally, I am hoping that there was some truth to it. Clearly, most of us are still here and the planet is still spinning, but there are a whole lot of things that we need to put an end to. My thinking is that periodically an “age” comes to an end and the course of the future shifts. If we could change that future what would we need to change?

I am old enough now to know that I am not too good at changing others so If I want any change I need to start by changing me.

This last year the blog has focused on a whole lot of problems. There sure are a lot of them. I have written about mental illness, substance abuse, and the struggles involved in overcoming those issues. It seems to me that it is time for a shift.

It is easy to point to the problems, but what do we do now, where do we go from here? Some of you may have taken note that I have been working on a couple of books that I hope to release before the end of 2013. The focus of those books is on how we recover; bounce back from the events in life that knock us down. I also plan to write more about how you go about planning for more resilience and recovery in your life.

So over the next year, I want to focus more on the road to happiness and less on the pain of the past. Regardless of what issue you are dealing with, I believe in recovery. So let’s spend some time in the year to come talking about how to be well, have a happy life and avoid relapsing into the issues that we have all struggled with.

Don’t think I have all the answers. I have learned a few things so far on this journey of life but every day seems to bring new questions. Chime in here from time to time and help me out with both the answers you have found and the questions that matter to you.

So the discussion needs to swing from diseases and disorders to solutions and recovery. From time to time we may need to go back and talk about a particular problem, but I will try to stay focused on how it is that people with this or that issue still manage to have happy lives.

Some of you are making New Year’s resolutions right about now. We will talk about that in the year to come. Me, I am not big on making resolutions. I do try to make changes, always making changes; I am a work in progress, not a done deal. So for me, change happens day by day. It is not always pretty but it keeps happening.

Please stay tuned and let’s see what we find on this journey towards a happier life.

Photo courtesy of Les Lucas.

Staying connected with David Joel Miller

Seven David Joel Miller Books are available now!

My newest book is now available. It was my opportunity to try on a new genre. I’ve been working on this book for several years, but now seem like the right time to publish it.

Story Bureau.

Story Bureau is a thrilling Dystopian Post-Apocalyptic adventure in the Surviving the Apocalypse series.

Baldwin struggles to survive life in a post-apocalyptic world where the government controls everything.

As society collapses and his family gets plunged into poverty, Baldwin takes a job in the capital city, working for a government agency called the Story Bureau. He discovers the Story Bureau is not a benign news outlet but a sinister government plot to manipulate society.

Bumps on the Road of Life. Whether you struggle with anxiety, depression, low motivation, or addiction, you can recover. Bumps on the Road of Life is the story of how people get off track and how to get your life out of the ditch.

Dark Family Secrets: Doris wants to get her life back, but small-town prejudice could shatter her dreams.

Casino Robbery Arthur Mitchell escapes the trauma of watching his girlfriend die. But the killers know he’s a witness and want him dead.

Planned Accidents  The second Arthur Mitchell and Plutus mystery.

Letters from the Dead: The third in the Arthur Mitchell mystery series.

What would you do if you found a letter to a detective describing a crime and you knew the writer and detective were dead, and you could be next?

Sasquatch. Three things about us, you should know. One, we have seen the past. Two, we’re trapped there. Three, I don’t know if we’ll ever get back to our own time.

For these and my upcoming books; please visit my Author Page – David Joel Miller

Want the latest blog posts as they publish? Subscribe to this blog.

For videos, see: Counselorssoapbox YouTube Video Channel