Unhelpful thoughts that are holding you back.

By David Joel Miller.

How many of these unhelpful thoughts are you holding onto?

Man walking on the moon

Reaching your goals-
Man Walking on the Moon
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Most people have a number of negative dysfunctional thoughts that get in the ways of having the happiest life possible. Some counselors call these thought patterns self-defeating thoughts or self-sabotaging.

Recently I have come to think of these thoughts as hugely unhelpful. Calling them unhelpful thoughts makes them easier to transform. If you have any of these unhelpful thoughts filling up your head and getting in the way of you being the person you want to be, if these kinds of thoughts are between you and your happy life, then now is the time to change these thoughts.

I should never make a mistake.

Do you think it is wrong to make a mistake? Making mistakes are a part of doing. The only way to avoid mistakes is to do nothing and that is a mistake. Cut yourself some slack and stop trying to be something you are not. No one is perfect. Accept this and let your best be good enough. Insisting on perfection keeps you stuck in mediocrity.

I am right and they are wrong.

This is sometimes called “right fighting.” Insisting on being right does not foster better communicator or move things along towards a resolution. It does not matter who is right. Rarely will continuing to insist that you are right make any difference. Let other people have their own opinions. Just because others may not agree with you should not diminish your view of yourself.

There is something missing in my life.

You have what you have. Continuing to focus on what is missing keeps you stuck. Really believe you need something then go out on a quest and find the missing element. What happens to so many people who spend their lives looking for that one missing element is that when they find it, it turns out the search was what they needed not the thing.

More money will fix what is wrong.

Money helps sometimes. More money creates more options. But most of life’s really major problems can’t be solved by money alone. If you put off action thinking that only money will make a difference you will miss out on a lot of other possibilities in life. Having money rarely happens all at once. People who have true wealth build it a little at a time over the long haul. Invest in yourself and the rest will follow.

Others need to change before I can.

Making others change is really hard. Most of the time you will not be able to make them change. If your reaching your goals requires others to change you are out of luck. The best way to create change in others is to change yourself first and then see how that puts others in a position to change in response.

My problems are someone else’s fault.

People can ease your path or make it more difficult. Continuing to blame others keeps you stuck in the past and in the problem. While others may have contributed to where you are, for good or bad, you are the one deciding whether to stay stuck in the past or move forward in the present.

Accepting that you are responsible for your choices and taking back your power over your future is on the path to recovery. Want to get unstuck? Start making your own choices. Stop looking over your shoulder at what others did to you in the past and start to look forward to what you will do for you in the future.

Things should not be this way.

The world is as it is. Energy focused on the problem is energy diverted from the solution. Dwelling on all the things that are wrong and insisting that things be the way you wish them to be will not change them.

Don’t like the way things are? Go about making changes. Start by changing you and then work on being of service to those around you.

I must have someone to love me.

To attract love into your life you need to be someone who loves themselves. Work on being the best you possible. Be your own best friend. Do kind loving things for you and those around you.

A partner can’t overcome the things you do not like about yourself.

 Other people must like me.

No one is ever liked by everyone. The more people do the more others will criticize them. Do what is right. Do what pleases you. You cannot please everyone all the time. If you please one person you may displease others. Focus too much on pleasing others and you will lose yourself.

I need to prepare before I can do something.

You are always doing what you are doing. You will not start out being perfect. Life is about growth and learning. Becoming good at anything requires practice. If you never begin because you are waiting to be fully prepared you will never get started.

My past controls my future.

Your past may have made you who you are but what you do now will make you who you will become. Every moment of every day we have choices. Some are small choices and some are larger. Those small choices can up to large changes over time.

Which of these unhelpful thoughts are holding you back? Which will you begin to change today?

Want to sign up for my mailing list?

Get the latest updates on my books, due out later this year by signing up for my newsletter. Newsletter subscribers will also be notified about live training opportunities and free or discounted books. Sign up here – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse and Co-occurring disorders see the about the author page. For information about my other writing work beyond this blog check out my Google+ page or the Facebook author’s page, up under David Joel Miller. Posts to the “books, trainings and classes” category will tell you about those activities. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books

Are you successful?

By David Joel Miller.

What is success and how would you know if you were successful?

Successful children

Being Successful
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Success is a slippery thing to catch hold of. When you say successful, most people think first of how much money someone makes. Money and success are not synonymous. Think about all those famous people, actors and musicians, that had the fame and the money but their life still ended up a disaster.

A few readers have responded to some past counselorssoapbox.com posts about success by telling me they did not care about being success because they were not all about money. In my thinking money and success are not the same thing, but for some people the thinking link between these two ideas is so strong they equate pursuing a goal other than money as not wanting to be “successful.” Some folks just can’t imagine being successful without having a pile of money. That seems sad to me.

People who live a good life, they are successful in my book. People who only have money and fame, eventually that goes away. It may come as a surprise to those who say they are not about money, that people who live a good life and have a proper relationship with money do not have to live in poverty to be a good person.

Successes is about achieving your potential. It is the result of being the best possible you rather than having the most other stuff.

Below are some ways to tell if you are living a successful life that is not dependent on how much you have in the bank or how many followers you have. Living a life of purpose and fulfilment is the best form of successes to my way of thinking.

How many of these ways are you successful?

You have good social skills – you get along with people

Highly successful people are able to get along with others. They enjoy diverse people and can interact with others regardless of that other persons characteristics. Really successful people treat others well and do not need to feel better than others to feel ok about themselves.

You look forward to your day

If you hate what you are doing and dread going to work, you may have piles of money, but your life is a failure. If you love what you do and look forward to each new day you are living a life of purpose. People who hate what they do each day eventually find that no amount of money is worth giving up their precious time. Ultimately they quit that job or their mind makes them ill to protect them from doing that unpleasant task.

You have a future

The successful life is headed towards something, not lugging a load of things after you. Today should not be the end of everything. If you find you think that nothing in your life will ever get better, that life is just something you have to endure, then you are in no way a success.

You value learning

People who love learning can find something new to learn every day. When learning is a chore, a drudgery that you do only because you have to, your world grows smaller and less joyous. Money does not compensate you for an unhappy life. A jubilant life is a great reward in and of itself. People who live a satisfying life are a pleasure to be around and they attract others of like mind to them.

You treat people well

People who feel good about themselves do not need to treat others poorly. One sign that you feel like a success is the way you treat others. If you need to put others down and act rudely that says a lot about how you feel about yourself. You may be able to buy compliance with fear or money but to truly have others care about you takes more, it takes treating others the way you would want to be treated and then some.

You help others – being of service

People who are successful think from a place of abundance. They have enough and they can afford to part with some. People who are stingy and selfish think that anything they part with diminishes them.

You are truly successful when you think of what you can do for others to be of service.

Setbacks do not end your progress

Every road has bumps, some larger than others. If a single set back throws you off course your success is not very secure. Highly successful people have failures and setbacks. Those obstacles do not define them. They are successful because they believe they are. For them success is the opportunity to pursue their dreams not the number of dollars they get paid for the things they did.

You have learned to control yourself

A rich person with no control can make a failure of themselves in short order. If you have learned self-control, some portion of it anyway, you can count that you have made some progress on your journey to being a successful person.

You keep improving

Success is about using your gifts and developing your talents to become a better you. No amount of having should get in the way of your journey to being the person you would like to be.

There is something you care about

A life of passion is a successful life. If you care about something you can commit to it and that gives your life meaning. How much money you will leave behind to others who only care about you for the dollars does not impart any meaning to a life.

The great deeds of heroes and average people are fuelled by deeps passions for the things that mattered most to them.

You have learned to wait for the good things – patience

Patience is not only a virtue it is the reward of a successful life. When you have the peace of mind to be able to wait for things you are in place of having what you need rather than chasing the wants of life.

You believe in yourself

If you need more of anything to feel you are acceptable you have not reached your fulfilment. Believing in yourself is a clear reflection that you are living your life in a fruitful way.

You do not need others approval to feel good about yourself your past is not controlling your present. Self-esteem is not about what you have it is about who you are.

You are able to freely make choices

Indecision is the opposite of a successful life. People who feel good about where they are can easily make choices. If you need others approval so much you bend your choices to please them you have not become all you might be.

You are able to accept help

Successful people know that everyone has the ability to make a contribution and they can easily accept help from others. If you feel the need to do everything yourself then you do not yet feel successful.

You spend your time on things that matter to you

If you are so short on time that it all needs to be spent on things and on pleasing others you are still poor in emotional terms. When you have the time to pursue things that matter to you then you have reached success regardless of the number of dollars in your bank account.

You see the good not the bad in people and situations.

The failure sees failure everywhere they look. For them the world is a dark and gloomy place. Successful people can see the good in others and the possibilities in life.

How many of these traits of a successful life have you cultivated?

Want to sign up for my mailing list?

Get the latest updates on my books, due out later this year by signing up for my newsletter. Newsletter subscribers will also be notified about live training opportunities and free or discounted books. Sign up here – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse and Co-occurring disorders see the about the author page. For information about my other writing work beyond this blog check out my Google+ page or the Facebook author’s page, up under David Joel Miller. Posts to the “books, trainings and classes” category will tell you about those activities. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books

What is the difference between Melancholy and Atypical Depression?

By David Joel Miller.

How are Melancholy depression, atypical depression and major depressive disorder related?

Pain, Anxiety, Depression, Stress

Pain, Anxiety, Depression, Stress
Photo courtesy of Flickr (marsmet481)

When you read around on the internet, and in some books on the subject also, you will find a lot of different names for depression. Some of these are understood as separate disorders because in doing research or in the way these disorders affect clients they look like different but related conditions. Some of these terms are primarily descriptors, technically descriptors, for the most significant feature of the depression. Some of the terms you will read about elsewhere are more descriptions of the thing that may have caused or be causing the depression.

Someday we may be able to run precise test, brain scan or blood test and identify specific forms of depression. There has been a lot of promising research in this field and some huge claims about ability to diagnose mental disorders by this or that test, but as of now most diagnosing is done by asking the patent questions, counting up symptoms and then if you have enough symptoms you get a disorder with a particular name.

Melancholy depression or atypical depression.

Melancholy depression and atypical depression are two “Specifiers” used to group cases of Major Depressive Disorder with similar features together for ease of reference. In the newer diagnostic book (DSM-5) there are 9 specifiers. These specifiers are somewhat changed from the older DSM-4 system. What follows is my over simplified explanation, for the full text of the description you would need to look at the APA book DSM-5.

What is Melancholy Depression?

Almost total loss of pleasure. Stuff that used to make you happy now just does not interest you. If you are too depressed to think about sex or a hobby you used to love, chances are you have melancholic depression.

With Melancholic depression nothing is likely to snap you out of it. You see a show that others say is funny but you can’t enjoy it and laughter is just too much work. If something good happens, it does not make you feel good even for a little while.

People with Melancholic depression have a noticeable down mood. They are despondent, hopeless or in despair. People with this form of major depression wake up way early and their depression is worse in the morning. They have changes in appetite and feel guilty.

This is the kind of depression that made its way into novels in the last century and may still be seen on soap operas. These literary efforts make this look like it is someone being dramatic or over acting. In the clinic this is a real enough disorder and people with this condition are not faking it for attention.

Depression with atypical features specifier.

With atypical features the depressed person can snap out of it a little for a while if something really good happens. They laugh at a joke, some of the time. Trouble is that the happy feeling is fleeting and disappears before they realize they just smiled.

With atypical features the person has significant weight gain and or increased appetite. They are always tired and drag around. With this type of major depression the image that should come to mind is a bear hibernating for the winter. They eat everything in sight and then sleep for hours. Upon waking they are too tired to walk around and after eating they return to sleep.

People with atypical features to their depression customarily have had a long-term pattern of feeling rejected. They are very sensitive to any hint of rejection, judgment or criticism and this often interferes with personal relationships, job, school or any other activity that involves getting along with others.

With Seasonal pattern depression specifiers.

Another specifier would be added if this person had the depression only at one particular time of year or at a transition between seasons. This requires the change of weather or seasons to be the trigger for the depression. If you work a summer or winter job and get laid off each year that is not seasonal depression. We know what caused it and the weather need not get blamed.

This type of depression is often called winter blues or it used to be called seasonal affective disorder before we split bipolar and depression into two very different groups of disorders.

Peripartum onset specific for depression.

The name of this specifier was changed and I think for good reason. This is the “thing” that used to get called postpartum depression. Turns out that lots of times this started out in the middle of the pregnancy. Starting before the birth of the baby is a bad sign as often this results in a more severe depressive episode.

Women who had postpartum depression now called Major depressive disorder with Peripartum onset, found that with each succeeding pregnancy the depression gets worse.

With psychotic features turns into two specifiers.

What used to be major depressive disorder with psychotic features has been subdivided into two specifiers. One is Mood congruent psychotic features and the other is mood incongruent psychotic features.

Catatonia.

This is that condition where a person stands frozen like a stature. It can be diagnosed separately without any depression but occasionally it appears as a specific type or specific for major depressive disorder.

This is a quick, abbreviated, run down on some features of Major Depressive Disorder. If you or anyone you know has these symptoms seek professional help. Getting help is not giving in to your illness. Getting help early can keep depression from getting far worse and ruining your relationships, job or your happy life.

For more posts on depression:

Want to sign up for my mailing list?

Get the latest updates on my books, due out later this year by signing up for my newsletter. Newsletter subscribers will also be notified about live training opportunities and free or discounted books. Sign up here – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse and Co-occurring disorders see the about the author page. For information about my other writing work beyond this blog check out my Google+ page or the Facebook author’s page, up under David Joel Miller. Posts to the “books, trainings and classes” category will tell you about those activities. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books

Are you catching a mental illness?

By David Joel Miller.

How would you know if you were becoming mentally or emotionally sick?

Mental Health or Mental Illness

Mental Health or Mental Illness?
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Some mornings I wake up a little out of sorts. Maybe a cough, maybe a headache or just a general feeling of tiredness. Am I getting a cold or flu or is this just a difficult morning? This is the allergy season, or maybe it is the cold and flu season, am I coming down with something? I hope not.

There is this morning routine, for me it is mostly the same each day. Hit the bathroom, comb my teeth and brush my hair, no wait, that should be the other way around. Maybe just brush them both. Then I take my vitamins and an allergy pill and hope the headache or other symptoms will go away. Blowing my nose, that might help also. You get the idea of my routine? Lastly I feed and water my cat and slow down long enough to pet her a few times.

But if, after a while, I am not feeling better, say after my morning coffee and some light breakfast. Now I am thinking maybe I am getting sick. If by mid-day I am still coughing sneezing and feeling tired something is surely wrong.

What would happen if I were developing a mental or emotional disorder? Would I know? Do you?

This does not mean that you could catch a mental illness from someone the way you might catch a cold. We know of no germ that will get you mentally ill. Hanging out with someone who has schizophrenia will not give it to you. Being around someone with Bipolar disorder will not make you Bipolar. Being “stressed out” or living an unhealthy lifestyle, that may put you at added risk to develop a mental illness however.

We believe that there are things that you might do to wear your body out and increase your risk of a physical illness, staying up to late, not enough sleep, poor diet and being in unhealthy surroundings all increase your risk of getting a cold. Taking good care of your physical body will reduce your risk of physical illnesses. But you might do everything right and still catch a cold. Same thing is true of depression, anxiety, stress related disorders and a lot of other emotional and mental illnesses.

If I am sneezing, coughing, have headaches and so on I am thinking cold. There are certain signs and symptoms that should make me think maybe I am developing an emotional problem. Remember my daily routine above? The last thing I do before I start my day is feed, water and pet the cat. If I forget to do this, or just do not feel like doing it one morning, this is, for me, a sign that I am not mentally at my best.

These signs and symptoms are different for everyone. How would you know if you are having a good day? How would you know if you are having a bad day?

Being a professionally trained person I know and could rattle off the symptoms if a number of mental disorders. For me they are relatively easy to spot during an initial assessment interview. But let them happen to me personally and I may not notice these signs till it is way too late. Remember that mental health professionals are not immune to stress, anxiety and depression. We should know tools to work on those things if they ever happen to us, but most professionals like other people don’t always spot those instances in ourselves until someone else notices them.

One thing that is very helpful is to take a look at your life, daily and maybe in longer increments. What do you do when feeling emotionally at your best and what are you like when you are getting less well?

By knowing what you are like on a good day and then what you are like when things are headed in the wrong direction you are in a better position to do something about those off days before they become stretches of mental illnesses.

If you want more information on this topic, how to get and stay mentally well. Take a look at the works of Mary Ellen Copeland. Her WRAP (Wellness and Recovery Action Planning) program includes lots of material on this and many other areas of life.

WRAP has come from the consumer movement. People who have had a diagnosed mental illness and have recovered. People who have been brave enough to talk about their recovery. This information has influenced the direction of professional treatment. Professionals like Kay Redfield-Jamison who have openly talked about having a mental illness have also impacted the view we take of treatment for mental illnesses.

There was a time when professionals thought that once you had a mental illness, that was it, your life now needed to be turned over to others to control. We know now that throughout the lifespan people can become less well or they can become more well and that there is this thing that we now call the wellness and recovery continuum.

My suggestion to those of you who have read this far is to educate yourself about mental health and wellness and see if there aren’t things you can do to improve your mental health no matter where you may be on that wellness and recovery continuum.

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Get the latest updates on my books, due out later this year by signing up for my newsletter. Newsletter subscribers will also be notified about live training opportunities and free or discounted books. Sign up here – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse and Co-occurring disorders see the about the author page. For information about my other writing work beyond this blog check out my Google+ page or the Facebook author’s page, up under David Joel Miller. Posts to the “books, trainings and classes” category will tell you about those activities. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books

Games to play with your inner child.

By David Joel Miller.

Have you forgotten how to play?

Learning to play

Play again
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

Children start out life being able to play naturally. As you get older it is easy to get caught up in the seriousness of the adult role. Some people get told far too early in life that they should grow up and act like adults. Happy, emotionally health people discover that being able to play can be a great stress reducer. Think some about how much you used to like to play. Wouldn’t it be nice if you could put some of that playfulness back in your life?

Once you get to be an adult you may have started to think that having fun was either expensive or involved high risk behaviors like drugs, alcohol or sex. There are plenty of ways an adult can have fun that do not involve high risk behaviors. Here are some suggestions for ways to play and have fun again in ways that are consistent with a health emotional life and recovery from whatever you may be recovering from.

Plan a tour for an out-of-town guest.

Where would you take an old friend or relative if they visited you in the town you live in for the first time? Bet there are tourist attractions you have never seen right around the corner from where you live.

Are their museums, quaint shops or other things that bring tourists to your town? Consider giving yourself a tour of all those hidden pleasures. Consider checking out the tourist must see spots in your own town.

Make up an excuse to play in the dirt.

Remember how much fun it was way back when playing in the dirt? Why can’t adults do that again? Plant a garden, go digging for rocks and minerals or work on an outdoor restoration project. Find a way to get back in touch with the earth in an adult fun way.

Physical effort, the kind you just can’t do in a suit and tie is good for the body and the soul.

Offer to babysit.

Like kids but yours have grown up and moved away? Help out someone and watch their kids. Volunteer to take some kids on a field trip or coach a team. See how much fun you can have sharing your experiences and knowhow with youngsters.

Go toy shopping.

Therapists who work with children get to use this excuse a lot. A major part of the fun of toys is shopping for them. Visit a toy store. Buy some toys for you and a partner or child to play. Consider donating some toys to needy children at a holiday. Any excuse to shop for toys will do.

Remember that doing for others is often more rewarding than doing for yourself.

Plan a craft project.

Craft projects are great fun for children of all ages from birth to how ever old you can be. Make something to decorate your home. A small handmade thing says this is my space whether it is at home or at the office. Handmade craft projects are great gifts also.

Color with crayons.

Remember when you used to do your art? Did you draw or color? Get that feeling again! There is nothing like crayons to bring out the child in you. You do not need to be a great artist to enjoy the process of expressing yourself.

Paint some rocks.

Honest the rocks do not mind. There are plenty of them. Think of all the fun things you could make decorating a rock. This can make a great group project. Have a contest for the best painted rock.

Looking again at common everyday items in a new way can spark your creativity. What shapes do you see in the rock? Can you bring them out by adding a touch here and a line there?

Mother earth scavenger hunt.

This is a great chance to combine a competition, you know how adults like competitions, with some teamwork and the great outdoors. What would you expect to see if you walked in the park or woods? Make a list of what might be there if you looked really hard. Did you see the squirrel and the toad?

You do not have to collect things or bring them home. Just capturing the memories of the things you saw can be an exciting fun-filled adventure. Take some photos or a video. That smart phone or tablet has uses beyond social media.

Those are some of my thoughts about how to change-up the pace and have some fun even if you are an adult. But the way it can help to reconnect with your inner child if you can persuade a real small child to accompany you on this expedition. Maybe a grandchild or plan an event with a friend or neighbor who has small children and could use an outing also.

Any other ideas for how to be childlike and have fun once more? Wouldn’t it be good to get some play back in your life?

Want to sign up for my mailing list?

Get the latest updates on my books, due out later this year by signing up for my newsletter. Newsletter subscribers will also be notified about live training opportunities and free or discounted books. Sign up here – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse and Co-occurring disorders see the about the author page. For information about my other writing work beyond this blog check out my Google+ page or the Facebook author’s page, up under David Joel Miller. Posts to the “books, trainings and classes” category will tell you about those activities. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books

Children with mental illness.

By David Joel Miller.

How much do you know about children and mental illness?

Childhood is not a happy time for many children.

Sad Crying Child

Sad Crying Child
Photo courtesy of Pixabay.com

We used to think that childhood was the happy time and then you grow up and have to struggle with life’s problems. That is the scenario for some people but more and more we are realizing that childhood is the time when these emotional problems begin to develop. There is a whole lot of anxiety and depression in children.

Being anxious is not something that you automatically outgrow, Truth is that most people with adult anxiety disorders had serious anxiety attacks in elementary or middle school. Untreated these kinds of problems can follow you throughout your adult life.

In adult therapy we discover that many adult issues were things that people experienced, learned from experience, between 8 and 18. These life lessons may have meds sense as a child but as an adult these learned lessons can hold you back. Some of them can keep you in pain for decades.

Part of healing from adult issues is going back and looking at the things you experienced and the lessons learned that are not helping you now as an adult. Anything you learned can be unlearned. I recommend parenting education for most adults even if they have no children. Knowing what is normal at a particular time in life can help you fix the parts of your life blueprint that you have gotten wrong or that you never drew in the first place.

Learning about childhood mental illness can help you, it can help you in raising your children and if everyone knew enough we might not pass on so many emotional problems to the next generation.

Here are some resources that may help you learn more about childhood mental illness and how to keep those issues from following you or your loved ones throughout the rest of your life.

Here are some resources that can tell you more about childhood mental illness.

National Institutes of Health

Take a look at this interesting infographic on children’s mental health issues titled:

Are the kids alright? 

Also:

Mayo Clinic

WebMD

Have you found any other good resources for information about children’s mental health?

Isn’t it time we looked more carefully at this problem?

Want to sign up for my mailing list?

Get the latest updates on my books, due out later this year by signing up for my newsletter. Newsletter subscribers will also be notified about live training opportunities and free or discounted books. Sign up here – Newsletter. I promise not to share your email or to send you spam and you can unsubscribe at any time.

For more about David Joel Miller and my work in the areas of mental health, substance abuse and Co-occurring disorders see the about the author page. For information about my other writing work beyond this blog check out my Google+ page or the Facebook author’s page, up under David Joel Miller. Posts to the “books, trainings and classes” category will tell you about those activities. If you are in the Fresno California area, information about my private practice is at counselorfresno.com. A list of books I have read and can recommend is over at Recommended Books